On the race there is a word that starts with V. It is a scary word. It is a word that most naturally run from.
Vulnerability.
At the beginning of the race, you are thrown into a team of six or seven virtual strangers. You have to dive in quickly to get to know each other. You can’t really help it since you are around those people 24/7. It’s inevitable.
You can choose how deeply you get to know your team and how deeply they get to know you. Me, I am an introvert. An INFP, if you are familiar with the MBTI. I internalize things; I process life in my head. Often I choose not to share what is in my head unless it is fully processed. I also tend not to open up about myself unless I am quite comfortable around a person–unless I feel safe sharing. And even then I don’t open up completely. I hold my V card close.
I know this about myself.
This past month I have done much reflecting on vulnerability. I’ve had varying degrees of vulnerability with my first two teams. With Team Valor, I was more vulnerable than the previous seven months. Perhaps it was the absence of men. Perhaps it was the incredible combination of women. Whichever it was, I felt very safe.
Near the end of the month, our contact prayed over each of us and spoke prophetic words over us. He compared me to a closed book; people don’t know how to read me, they don’t know what kind of book I am. Yep.
All of the thoughts I’d had over the month, all of the things that God showed me–they collided.
The closed book and vulnerability collided with a teaching from my church in Portland I had recently listened to. My church encourages everyone to be in a missional community (an MC). An MC is comprised of three parts: Family, Mission, and Discipleship. (There is an excellent sermon series available in podcast form if you want to know more.) My thoughts on MCs are specific to discipleship. Discipleship looks like a handful of people coming together weekly to study the Bible and share life. A true discipleship group is vulnerable with each other. I’m talking about two hour testimonies–sharing everything, even the nitty gritty that formed who you are today. A true discipleship group is honest about struggles and is encouraging to one another. A true discipleship group calls each other to a higher way of living and to a closer walk with God. A true discipleship group cannot hold onto their V card. They have to be the most vulnerable and go deep.
That is what my team is like for me this year. No matter which team I am on, they are my discipleship group. We meet every day for devotions and live together 24/7. They know where I am struggling and where I am growing. They know how to speak encouragement into my life and call me out on things that stunt my growth. To get to the point of the most growth, I have to give up my own V card and be vulnerable. I have to be raw.
I have started the process of increased vulnerability by encouraging teammates to ask me questions about my life when they want to know something that I may not automatically offer up. I also connected to my creative side and illustrated the story of my life. I then shared it with my team and unexpectedly took two hours telling my story. It was awesome.
During debrief I also stood on a chair in front of my squad and declared, I am an open book!
I encourage you to find a discipleship group if you are not already a part of one. Gather two friends and commit to meet every week. Tell each other your stories, your struggles, and your successes. Grow together in the Bible. If you already are a part of a discipleship group, go deeper. Give up your V card and let them walk with you. The resulting fruit is worth the difficulty of being vulnerable.
