Buenas tardes from El Cristo de Sabanilla, which is the town we are staying in just outside of San Jose, Costa Rica.
It’s been two weeks since we landed in Costa Rica and stepped into our ministry home of Transforma and in this short amount of time, God has already broken me down and taught me so much.
Transforma is a beautiful organization that works in the impoverished communities around San Jose. Its focus is to teach the women and teenage girls skill sets that they can turn into a business of their own while also teaching them kingdom values. The women come to the house every morning, Monday through Friday. We start off every morning together with a devotion/kingdom value lesson and prayer. Following this the women go into their classes. The classes include sewing, hair cutting, manicure/pedicure, massages (and yes we volunteer as tribute to be the ones they practice on…tough life, I know.), cooking, English, and entrepreneurship classes. And on every Wednesday, we visit the women in their homes and pray over them and their families.
I love where God placed us for our first month. We are staying in a house with a full kitchen and beautiful terrace overlooking the mountains. We each have beds to sleep in and are able to shower whenever we want and most days we have WiFi. However, even with all of this I’ve been struggling. I’ve only been gone three weeks and I’m homesick. What is that about?!
To be completely transparent, yesterday was a rough day for me. It was a Costa Rican holiday, so we woke up thinking it would be an easy day only to find out later we would be overwhelmed with our work load. However, most of our tasks required WiFi and it wasn’t working. After our team meeting, I took my journal, Bible, and phone into our children’s school room. I sat down in the corner, turned on some Hillsong and the tears just started flowing. I missed my family, my friends and my comfort so much. I thought there’s no way I can last the full 11 months. What have I done?! Why did I think I was cut out for this? Did I really take the time to think about how long 11 months would be? Was this really God’s plan for me or my own plan?
But our God is such an awesome and gracious father. I love how He always gives us exactly what we need in the exact moment we need it. He quickly reminded me that this is exactly what I had prayed for a year ago. I prayed for Him to use me in whatever way He needed. I prayed for Him to break me down to a place where I had no choice but to find my strength in Him.
In the middle of God reminding me of this, I looked down at my phone and my mom was calling. I quickly choked back the tears and tried to sound like I was perfectly fine and after I got off the phone, I felt God telling me “I see you and I will always give you what you need when you need it. Trust me through the storms and I will see you through to the light”. He continuously gave me passage after passage that reminded me why I signed up for the race and how I can continue on even when I’m so homesick it hurts. Although, yesterday was very hard, it was also the most rewarding yet.
So with all of this, I hope you too will go to the Lord with your pain because He desperately wants to comfort you through it. You are precious in his eyes and when you lean into Him and open your heart to listen, He will give you an answer.
“My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore, most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore, I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ’s sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”
2 Corinthians 12: 9-10
