We are a new team of people. All of us lived together last month and all of us are gifted in different and wonderful ways. We have found joy and laughter because of Christ and the hope that He brings every day. Maybe today will be the day that He answers my prayer for rain and a cold front. We continue to pray against malaria, parasites, and sickness. We continue to pray for support, our families back home, and that we keep Jesus at the center of our actions. I’m learning to surrender everything to Him. EVERYTHING. He’s told me on several occasions, “Ann, I don’t only want to be in this part of your life, I want to be your life.� Me being well, me, I keep trying to take back something for myself. Trying to believe that I can be self reliant, that I can control a situation, that I can make it better, but really none of that’s true. I can’t control the situation by myself, nope. I can’t make it better on my own. I can’t rely on myself, I’m not perfect and to keep pursuing perfection is exhausting, because I always let me down. I need to let Him control everything (He already does anyways) I need to let His will be done (it’s way better than anything I’ve got planned, not to mention it’s got way better long term effects) and I need to rely on Him (He’s perfect, Boom). “Ann I want you to rely on me, your creator, your loving Heavenly Father. Trust me, I’ve got this.-Sincerely, God. P.S. I love you very much.� That last part is hard, I often ask “Why? Why on earth do you love me? I am such a screw-up and I always do things the hard way, I never seem to hear your voice, and when I do I tend to do my own thing.� “Ann, you are my child. I know you screw up, and that’s okay, I can redeem those mistakes, you’ve already been forgiven so please let it go. It’s all a part of the learning process Ann. As we grow in our relationship, you’ll learn which voice is mine, and you will trust me more and more. Just know that you are mine, and that I love you.�-God “So about that cold front.�-Me
