I’ve been thinking about what to write for this post for most of the week and realized I’m probably overthinking it. So here are just a few observations and lessons I learned.
First of all I appreciated that AIM from the very beginning challenged us in those first sessions. We were asked to lay down our expectations and to ask ourselves if we in fact truly trusted God with this experience we were about to begin.
Throughout the first part of the week I learned and relearned ideas regarding personality differences, spiritual warfare, and the role of the Holy Spirit among many other things. This was all excellent material and I have no doubt I will be able to apply this information practically in life now and beyond the race.
That being said for most of the week I thought I had let go of my expectations. But by the last few days of training I realized I still had a lot of work to do in the area of my pride and honestly believing God is doing what is best for me. These areas are something I have struggled with before and I know will always have room to grow in.
Secondly, I was personally challenged in a way I didn’t expect. Often before and during worship time there was joyful dancing and the music was often at a very high volume. As an introvert I struggled with this especially by the end of the week. And yet surprisingly, though I know I shouldn’t have been, God spoke to me especially during these times. The following underlined statements are a few things I believe He was impressing upon me to remember.
Saturday night: Loving God and loving others is the best thing you can do for yourself.
I truly hope I can remember this in the good and challenging times during the race.
Sunday night: In your weakness, I AM your strength.
I don’t like being weak but that doesn’t change the fact that I am weak in more ways than I care to admit. I must learn to rely on Him more and more.
Monday night: I love you, I have always loved you, I have never hated you!
That last part is critical for me and space doesn’t permit me to elaborate but this means more than I can convey.
There were other things He taught me as well but the overall theme He seems to be trying to get across (this past week and year) is how deep His love is for me.
And so I close with the following verse. This is one I have heard often but rarely took the time to truly consider in all its implications. Essentially nothing (including my own doubt, fear, weakness and lack of love) can separate me from God’s love.
“…we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us. For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:37-39
