I am sitting in a place of desolation. I hear a lady crying out in pain constantly. I see life and death before my eyes. The cries echo through the room as the other patients sleep soundly. I sit here with my headphones in listening to worship music and feel that I must get up and pray for this lovely lady who is screaming.
I wrote that first paragraph while I was sitting in the hospital at 3 AM last Saturday night. My teammate had become very sick and was staying in the hospital for about a week. The day I was going to stay with her, by that I mean sleep outside the hospital just in case she would need anything, she received a room. A room in the free hospital here is not private really. It is a room with four people of all varying illnesses. However, I was thankful to be able to stay with her the first night she was able to actually have people visit her and I really enjoyed being able to talk to her about all of her experiences so far and be able to see her rest for an entire night.
It’s amazing the things that you learn in that stillness. The stillness of a hospital at night. The quietness that we often forget to experience. I am guilty of not embracing the silence. I love music and noise. I don’t like silence, yet all God has been teaching me lately is how much He wants to speak to me in the silence. If I will just listen, He will show me many things.
So, this night as I am sitting in the hospital at about 3:30 AM, I turned off the music and all I heard was an occasional noise from a patient. God began to show me the importance of walking in my life. I know we all know walking is important, but what I mean is in my life if I walk with you, you are someone I value. I began thinking of the people I go on walks with and they are the most important people in my life. A walk is not merely a form of exercise, although that is an excellent byproduct. A walk to me is a time to share and connect with the one whom I am walking. It takes time and focus. I have been on many walks that I didn’t want to end. After I was done walking, I would stop and continue the conversation until one of us just had to go. I love walking with some of my closest friends. It is probably one of my favorite things to do. Walking…such a simple activity…but oh so important in my life.
Why did I go on and on about walking for so long? Let’s go back to that Jesus teaching me to be silent thing. As much as He wants me to listen, He wants me to walk with Him. Not playing follow the leader, but walking alongside Him. He wants me to talk to Him and listen to Him and be close to Him. He wants me to not want to quit walking because I am enjoying my time with Him so much. He wants me to learn what it means to truly walk with God as a friend and a father. Proverbs 13:20 says, “He who walks with the wise will become wise.” I often refer to this verse when I evaluate my friendships and with whom I spend my time. I can’t think of anyone wiser to walk with than Jesus the giver of all wisdom.
As I have begun my month in Honduras, I have had incredible experiences and have met some new amazing people. I have loved on children, dug trenches, and moved rocks. I have ridden in really crowded buses and actually been to the movies and the mall. I am learning a lot about patience, love, and silence. All three of which, I have to work hard to develop. Now, I am starting a walk with Jesus that I hope will never end, even if I have to linger until one of us has to go.
