Thinking about this week I was slightly frustrated because I feel like I didn’t do anything. Jordan, a guy from the team we’re with this month, and I had to bring all our team’s passports to Pretoria to get visas for China. Monday we worshipped together and met with our contacts about what we felt the Spirit was leading us in this week. Tuesday we took a 7 hour bus ride. Wednesday we hung out in Pretoria with the two teams there. Thursday we took another bus ride back. Friday we are going to Kruger National Park for a legit safari! And Saturday is our day off. In sharing my frustration of not doing any ministry for a week, my friend and fellow team leader Emily Kutz reminded me to be thankful that God gave me a week of rest.
Although I am thankful for rest, I didn’t come on the race to rest. I came on the race to transform lives, mine being one of them. What I am realizing is God usually has different plans than I and that His plans are always WAY better than mine! It’s okay to take rest and soak up the presence of The Lord. I want to be hidden in His heart.
I still want to live a successful life and make a difference, but that does not mean I have to always be focused on what I will do next. I am learning that it’s okay and not at all sinful or lazy to sometimes just be. Being is difficult for me.
“God does not demand that I be successful. God demands that I be faithful. When facing God, results are not important. Faithfulness is what is important.” – Mother Teresa. Gosh, that woman had it figured out!
We are such a results-focused culture, where what matters is the outcome. It doesn’t matter how you get there or who you bring down on the way. Everyone’s eye is on the prize of one day living the American Dream. We are a nation founded on religious freedom and being ‘under God’. The American Dream is ‘under me’ focusing on me, myself, and I.
God demands faithfulness. In America we don’t have to be faithful because all of our material needs are met. It is easy to function daily without relying on Him. I have noticed more and more that the materially poor here are so spiritually rich. They HAVE to depend on God day-to-day for their livelihood. They say “if God doesn’t show up, I will die.” I want to have that level of faith and dependence on the Lord.
Since I am not materially poor, I NEED my faith to grow and for God to show up in different ways. I ask for divine appointments: a situation to occur when I know that it only could have happened this way with the Lord’s hand. Divine appointments are sweet gifts, wrapped so elegantly, dripping with the magnificent handiwork of a God who loves well. I am still on the bus and am praising God for the divine appointment that He just blessed me with.
When we got on the bus we decide to sit on the left side where there are only two seats. Just in case the bus gets full we wouldn’t have to sit by a smelly stranger. The bus still has an hour before leaving, but the three year old little girl sitting behind me keeps kicking my seat. In an attempt to get away from the seat kicker and have some more room, we move across the aisle taking up three seats. The bus leaves and 10 minutes later Jordan notices a car next to the bus trying to wave down the driver with a young woman waving her ticket around furiously.
The bus driver pulls over and I am annoyed. Not only were we late leaving, but now we pick up a girl that missed a different bus! Then, she just HAD to ask me to scoot over so that she could take up the extra seat we had going for us. Peeved a little bit more, I tell Jordan that he was right in his suggestion of sitting in the two seater row and put my headphones in. The girl says something to me, I take out my headphones and say “what?”
I find out this is her first bus ride, ever, as a 19 year old woman. My heart begins to soften as I heard her story. She was kicked out of her house at age 15 by her own mother, who had her at age 17. The girl told me her mother didn’t believe her accusations of her mother’s boyfriend physically and sexually abusing her. At 15 she stopped going to school and begin life on her own. She is learning to cut hair and her fiancé is a mechanic.
I found out that she believes in God and knows that He protects her. She told me she does not go to church because of how judgmental they are there. I agreed and we talked about sin. She hopes that she will get to heaven, but was unsure. I shared with her how I know without a shadow of a doubt that I will be going to heaven and she listened eagerly.
When I asked her how I could pray for her, what she wanted Jesus to do for her she answered “I never want to be like my mother, depend on a man” she said. “I want to be completely independent. If my fiancé and I don’t work out, I want to be okay on my own.”
I found out that she left home at 3 am to make the bus. They got lost and missed the bus she was supposed to be on. She said she prayed the whole way there that she would make the bus. I told her God has His hand watching over her always and she agreed. She got off before I could pray for her, but I was able to encourage her and remind her of God’s presence and that He desires all of her.
She reminded me of the many blessings that I DO NOT deserve. My family. Supportive, loving parents. My education. Never worrying about my next meal or if I’ll have a bed to sleep in. The freedom to travel.
Lord, thank you for divine appointments and reminding me of your goodness. Even though I wanted to remain annoyed and did not want to talk to that girl, you blessed my obedience. You softened my heart and gave me Your eyes.
