That was the phrase that resonated within me the whole week at training camp. It started on the first night of Training Camp during worship. The band played a song, You Make Me Brave by Bethel, that I thought was annoying at first, but as the week went on the song made its way into my head, to my thoughts and into my heart. It was a way God was trying to speak to me… I heard/felt/sensed God’s voice and presence in ways I’ve never imagined.
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I’ve been waiting to write about Training Camp. Honestly I didn’t know what to write. I want to tell you guys what you’re probably thinking, that it was fun and exciting and that I was so happy to meet my squad of 45 people. And it was, but it was also so much more than that.
It’s anguishing to try and put words to what my heart is trying so desperately to communicate. It truly feels like an internal struggle to try and pull out the amount of love, happiness, sadness, and just pure emotion from my week and put it on pen and paper. It leaves me wondering how am I ever going to process what happens on the Race if I’m still processing what happened at Training Camp.
It started like this: Friday July 18th. It was my last day to try and get to my goal of $9,000 and I had $7,475. At 10 am I post a “S.O.S. I need to raise $9,000 in a day!” status on Facebook. Then a couple minutes later I get a text from a friend saying his parents want to talk to me about donating. I went over to their house and they GAVE ME $1,000. I wanted to cry. I wanted to cry when a family friend gave me a check for $500 the night before. The feeling of receiving humbles you. In my hand I held a $1,000 check from people I barely knew and I could do nothing but say, “Thank you.”
I then put in my $260 I made from shirts and my $400 from paychecks, but I still needed to get supplies. I know it’s crazy and so last minute, but I was just waiting for God to give me what I needed to go. He gave me what I needed, He opened the floodgates of heaven and it was raining (donations). After getting some of the supplies at REI later I still needed $1,300. I was really out of options. I did not expect this, but my parents wrote me a check for $1,300. I had $800 of donations still processing ($200 was still processing on line and $300 was in the mail) so really all I needed was $500 more to have $9,000.
I know it may be confusing but here’s what you should know: I had $300 June 19th a month later I had $9,000 in my account. Some would argue it was luck or hard work. But I say there is no way I could have done this by myself. At times I felt like giving up, like it wasn’t worth it or it wouldn’t happen anyways. I was surrounded by doubt from others and myself who didn’t believe that it could happen. Well it did. I haven’t even taken the time to figure out how it all happened. God came through. And as of today I have $10,391. My end Goal is $12,487.50. Thank you so much all who donated and prayed for my provision. I could not have done this alone.
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Guatemala, Thailand, and Botswana!!! That is my route in order.
At training camp: I met my squad. I met my 7-person team. I met my friends. I met my family. I ate food that was purposely made bad. I went to an international road market. I survived with tarp, rope, food, and water. I loved. I felt loved. I became vulnerable. I felt homesick. I fell to my knees and worshipped. I slept on a bus with 45 other people. I swam across a 300-yard lake. Twice. I found brotherhood. I cried. I wept. I danced. I was healed. I shared. I got up at 6 every day. I never had a schedule. I laughed. I took bucket showers. I felt the Holy Spirit. I felt oil being poured onto me. I poured myself out. I learned. I felt disappointment. I became free. I was at peace. I was reassured. I was wrapped in the presence of God, I felt Him.
The song You Make Me Brave was played almost every night. At training camp I was scared of leaving home, I was scared to go and be a leader, I was scared. But God kept hammering into my head that He makes me brave.
“You make me brave. You call me out beyond the shore into the waves.”
Here is a picture of most of my squad! Squad Gap A.
