I don’t think I have fully processed all of what has happened in the last 10 days, but here is where I’m at.
When I left for Georgia on the 14th I was a different person than I am right now. That fact can largely be attributed to the people whom I spent my time with since then, people who have returned to their respective home changed people as well. When I flew into Atlanta for the “Man Hike” prior to World Race training camp, I really had no idea what I was getting myself into. I soon learned that this was not any hike I’d ever been on before, but rather a hike 19 miles down the Appalachian trail in the Georgia mountains, complete with approximately 3500 feet in elevation change along the way. I did not have the strength to do this. But I didn’t need to have it. Very shortly after I began ascending the first climb of the hike, I was already feeling exhausted. My heart was pounding out my chest, my legs were burning, and I was struggling to catch my breath. That’s when I witnessed what it truly meant to bear your brother’s burdens.
Without hesitation, the men around me, all of whom I had met in person just one day prior, began to carry the weight from my backpack, in addition to their own, so I could make it up the mountain. Even after this I had no clue how I would make it the entirety of 19 miles, but they weren’t about to go there without me. I was tabbed to take the lead and set the pace for the group, with the guarantee that my brothers would follow me no matter what. I had never seen this degree of sacrifice and selflessness made for my behalf in my entire life. So over the course of 2 days, 19 miles, and 3500 feet of elevation change, my brothers pushed me when I needed to be pushed, prayed for me when I needed to be prayed for, and carried everything I had, without a single negative comment, look, or action. At one point I felt compelled to tell one of the leaders of my group for the hike about how much what they were doing meant to me, and he asked me if I wouldn’t mind sharing this with the rest of my new brothers. After I did so, their response blew me away. From that point forward, I was inundated with encouragement and praise, as my brothers kept telling my how they admired my strength and courage. As I continued, they wouldn’t let me deny it, or forget it. I was blown away. Finally after two days of hiking through the cold, rain, wind, and briefly hail, I made it to the end, with my brothers swelling with pride for me.
It was with that victory I finally realized that I am stronger than I could have ever imagined, because I have the living God within me, carrying me through the storm, to the highest heights. I am still in awe. From there I went to training camp, and met the rest of my amazing squad. And I don’t say that lightly, they all are truly amazing. When I showed up to training camp, I still was $2100 short of what I needed for my first deadline in order to be able to participate. However, God provides in crazy ways. In this instance, God provided through one of my amazing teammates. This unbelievable humble and selfless person showed up to training camp with a check for the balance of what I needed to stay on the squad leaving on route 1 of the World Race in July. Over the course of the next week, this group of unbelievable human beings would become like my family. I laughed with them, I cried with them, I challenged and was challenged by them, and I praised God with them. It feels like I have known them for years, and I love them all.
The most important thing that happened over this past week was that God showed up, in a big way. Training camp wasn’t exactly like I expected, but it was exactly what I needed. I was forced out of my comfort zone physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. As a result, God took away many of the barriers that have been holding me back, and instead replaced them with a new passion and desire to live a life sold out for Him entirely – something I have been praying for a long time. I have been broken of all the garbage and distraction that has been so cumbersome for so long. I have seen a glimpse of what it looks like to serve live a life that reflects Jesus to those around me. I am starting to be cured of the sickness known as fear that has weakened my witness and the abundant life that God has laid out before me.
In July, I will leave for the World Race. I was leave closer to being the person God has intended for me to be than ever before. He will not leave me. He will not let me go. He has big plans for me. He has big plans for all of us. I know He is in control.
Realizing his control over everything has given me a peace I’ve never had before, and something I desperately need, especially in the hard times. As I left the last of my teammates, I headed for my terminal at the Atlanta airport to catch my plane. I turned my cell phone on, walked up to my gate, and peered my eyes at the first TV I had seen in 10 days. What I saw made my stomach turn, and my heart sink. All I could think was “Oh, my God.”
As I learned about the tragedy that had unfolded outside my Alma Mater of UCSB, in my former home of Isla Vista, a million things ran through my head. Most of them weren’t could. I was sad. I was angry. I was confused. I was heartbroken. But in that moment, instead of panicking or falling into despair, I began to pray. The peace of the Lord fell upon me, and I was comforted. I am grateful no one I knew was hurt, but reminded of the evil that has befallen this world, even the the places we hold near and dear to our hearts. This world is broken. We try and we try and we try, but we cannot fix the brokenness. This world cannot save itself. This world needs Jesus. Desperately. More and more every day. I can no longer justify living a life that is not sold out for the purpose of bringing the world the only true hope it has.
I come home now as a man with the strength and courage to live a life sold out for the purpose of bringing Jesus to the people everywhere I go. The first time I ever shared Jesus with someone was on the UCSB campus, to a one of my Isla Vista neighbors. I will spend to next year, and the rest of my life, sharing Jesus with people to the ends of the Earth.
My Squad (D Squad)
My Team (3D)
