Cutter. You’re a cutter. You’re worthless. You’ll always be worthless.
Ugly. Depressed. Emotional. Yet, emotionless.
That was my identity.
Fear. Suffocating fear.
That was my life. That was my story.
My story changed March 12, 2008.
Who ever thought I’d become a Christian? Who ever thought the depressed annoying “emo” child would fall in love with Jesus. Who ever thought that girl would ever find a faith that was her own?
I sure didn’t. I thought I’d die a “catholic”. Not bashing on Catholicism at all! I was simply born into the religion without any proper education or education of it at all.
I was born in Chicago July of 1992.
My parents (both born and raised in Mexico) are Jose and Maria Sepulveda.
I have 3 sisters on my dads side, one sister on my moms side, and two brothers (one older one younger).
I was the baby for 5 years. Crystal Sepulveda was born but met Jesus really early in her life when meningitis got to her at only 2 and a half months old. I was the baby for 6 more years.
I never knew what my identity was. I never knew what an identity was. I never knew or believed I would live past 16 years old.
There have been things in my life that some people may call “horrible”, but in my family, each thing has made us stronger.
We didn’t always know that though.
After much persistence from a good friend, I finally texted her after a night of serious thoughts of suicide and asked her if I could go to church with her.
I had nothing left to lose.
I remember what I was wearing. Black leggings under my punk-rock Hot Topic skirt, my favorite blue shirt with a black top attached to it, hair in front of my face, dark eyeliner surrounding my already brown/black eyes, and my “suicide” aka first and favorite pair of Converse.
Expecting a sermon or something, I was slightly shocked when I saw a black “youth room” with graffiti on the walls and couches everywhere.
My friend introduced me to the youth pastor and he, my friend, two other teens, his wife and I went to a different room during the hour and a half or so of when youth group was supposed to be going on.
I vented. I ranted. I spoke of my unbelief and hatred towards this so-called-“God”. He listened. They cared. They loved me. I never felt like anyone actually listened to me and respected me, so when they did I was amazed. I was instantly intrigued. At the end of the long yet much needed session of pure thoughts in my head, I accepted Jesus as my Lord and savior.
That simple.
A few weeks later, I remembered the night that made me text my friend about church. I remembered feeling something more was left. Something hopeful. Something with purpose. A few weeks later during youth group, we read Revelation 3:20 “Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with that person, and they with me.” In an instant, I knew God had been seeking me my whole life, and it only took me 15 ½ years to realize it.
My journey with God ever since has been like an obstacle course. Some obstacles were harder than the last, some feeling as though they’d never end. But no matter what obstacle I’ve faced, knowing that God is there more and more each time and obstacle is overcome makes me feel like a champion; like a princess. My father, the King of Kings, loves me. He won’t give up on me. Ever.
I live because He has given me life. I breathe because He has given me breath.
I know there are a lot of empty areas in my condensed story, but hopefully as time passes the puzzle pieces will come together.
God has called me to be a missionary. The World Race is my next step. I long to help the lost get found. I hunger and thirst for God’s love to be poured out from land to land and from sea to sea. I refuse to live in complacency.
I am Royalty. I have Destiny. I have been set Free. I’m going to change the world. <3
My Name is Andrea Sepulveda. July 2013, Route 3 is my next journey.
Join me?
