So many of you know I am heading for the world Race in just about a month! I am so excited!….. I decided to share a story about training camp that really put the trip in perspective. It was a week long in Atlanta Georgia, very cold, and we slept in tents and random places they gave us (an old bus) to give us a feel of what can happen on the field and what living conditions would be like. To tell the truth I was not myself. I felt almost angry, annoyed, extremely tired, and not at peace of where I was during this week.( i had no idea why)
You know when your stuck in those crappy moods and you have no idea why and then your even more annoyed cause you just cant snap out of it? well that was kind of how i felt. No matter how much I prayed and made the choice to be happy and enjoy the time! I just wasnt myself and felt like i had no control over my emotions or mind. So the end of that week they gave us our teams that we would be living with for the year. I was put on an all girls team with 6 other women. And when i found that out I just wanted to be done. that was my breaking point. I knew I had to give up my rights for 1 year but gods plan was not what I had in mind.
The last night I had my friend Kirsten pick me up early , instead of camping out and leaving in the morning I called her and had to get out of there. She picks me up, we get in her truck, and Im balling (from being overwhelmed) and I just start telling her everything. Im talking and talking and crying. 7 min later… BOOM. My side of the truck is hit by a car. We spin a 360 and drive straight into the ditch where we miss a giant pole by about 2 inch. Not joking it was like god picked it up last min and moved the pole over. We were both Silent ..i thought i was dead… And all that was running through my mind was (Im sorry god). I literally said it out loud. Im so sorry god.
Thats when it hit me, I was not ready to die. Here I am crying because I dont know if im supposed to be doing the race, (even though I know god has called me. Here I am crying cause im on an all girls team when thats not what I planned. I could have been dead. I did not trust god, I was selfish, I have this amazing opportunity hundreds of people would jump at if they could. And yet god still protects me. I forget how forgiving he is, how many chances he gives us. It amazes me how I have seen miracles god has done on the sick, and demonic. But how i still struggle to trust him with my own life. When we crashed …god was the first person I called on. So why is it so hard for me to trust in him daily with the little things? By the way all I had was a bad bump on my head and some scratches. But yet my window was missing and almost the door, and I was not wearing a seat belt!
But honestly that was exactly what I needed. I needed a miracle from god to show me I do have a purpose, that I am where I am supposed to be. Not by my choices but by his voice I have heard. He is so good. SO GOOD! And all that is running through my head this week is WE ARE SAVED BY FAITH!!!! we are saved physically, we are saved spiritually, we are saved emotionally. WWHHAAAAHHHOOOO IM ALIVE! HAAH!!! Ephesians 2:8 for by grace you are saved through faith, and that not of yourselves: it is a gift of god.!!!!
