I remember when I first decided to do the race and that was when I truly understood intimacy with the Father. Before then, I had never once heard about what intimacy was. It was a completely foreign subject for me!
I think back to that season of life when the veil was torn before my eyes, how tender and precious it was to truly discover the Father’s love for the first time in my life.
I’m not sure how to write this blog. I haven’t written a vulnerable blog since my race. Looking back I actually realized I was much more bold in my writing than before so what’s stopping me from doing that again? Nothing.
Here goes nothing….
I first want to write about the word a received for the year.
Betrothed.
Yeah I know what you’re thinking, “okay Anabelle thinks she’s going to get engaged.” But that actually wasn’t the case at all. When I first heard the word I knew the Father was going to bring me back into a season of intimacy. Here’s how I heard: my best friend Sarah and I were driving to the mountains to stay with our friend Bryan’s amazing mom who we love very much in February! On our way up we were talking about scripture and what-not. She said she read a verse about moving forward and something in my brain clicked. My word from last year was “forward”, and I had heard it the prior February as well (I was a little late last year). But until that very moment, I didn’t understand what it meant. So I told Sarah and then said, “well I guess I need a new word for this year” and that’s when I heard the still small voice say, “betrothed”. I laughed in my head and kept it to myself. Sarah turned to me and said, “what if it’s betrothed?” I screamed and told her what I heard but then said I would pray on it more. The very next week, I went to work and took my client to football practice. As he was practicing I decided to read my Bible. I absolutely adore the book of Hosea and so of course you can find me there. Well, as I was reading a thought popped into my head, “what if the word betrothed was on the next page?” I laughed to myself at that thought and said to myself if I were to see it on the next page then it would be my word for the year. Low and behold, there it was! The top of the page. The very next verse the word betrothed.
This word. It wrecks me…in such a wonderful way.
Let me tell you why this word is so tender and significant to me.
When I got home from the race it truly felt as though intimacy was lost between the Lord and I. This past year of being home has been so challenging and felt so barren. I had experienced depression and anxiety for the first time in my life and did not press into the Lord in time when I should have. It’s been a journey indeed. When the Lord asked me to team lead I did not feel like I was capable, but the second I was back on the Adventures In Missions base where it all began for me I knew it was truly what He had for me. So we’ve come full circle.
The Lord telling me my word for the year, taking me back to where I first understood intimacy and to now.
Truly, truly, I say to you I have been left so spoiled by the Lord. He reminded me that intimacy was not lost and He has given me an outpouring of it. My time in Guatemala has been me continually filling up in the secret place with the Father, so that I can pour out to my team and let me tell you the Lord is so intentional. He knows exactly what I need in this season and has given me an abundance of that. So I am writing this blog to truly say I will NOT forget who my First Love is. Let me tell you, the Lord won’t let me forget who my First Love is either. Recently, one of the gals on my team decided to make us little cards with a prophetic word on it. For me, she heard the word betrothed! Of course!!!
What even is the significance of the word Betrothed? Well I have found a few: engaged (to be married), bound to, chosen (to be married), and in a couple other contexts it could mean surrendered or to expose. Pretty crazy to think one word could have so much significance.
Why am I even sharing this you may ask? Well because in Matthew 10:27 it says, “What I tell you in the dark, speak in the light; and what you hear whispered in the ear proclaim on the house tops.” I get to be bound to, chosen by, surrendered to, exposed by my Heavenly Father. Even more so, I get to (hopefully) encourage others to seek His heart first and foremost. You can do all the things, but without love, relationship, and heart it means nothing. SEEK HIM FIRST!
Also, for those of you who don’t know, my birthday is tomorrow! I am turning 21 and for my 21st birthday I am asking 98 (because I was born in 98) people to donate $21! If you feel called to donate to me you can click the donate button up top or venmo me at @ana_meows Thank you all to those who have helped me so far! I truly appreciate it, and I know the gals I am leading here do too!
