Last night I was camped out in front of our house here in Kathmandu, Nepal. Three nights after the earthquake that took place on Tuesday afternoon. I was listening to music and talking with God and the song “Oceans” came on. (There is a link at the bottom where you can listen to it) I have sang that song soooo many times. In church, in my car, as a squad, over and over again.
Often during times of worship through music, someone will say “make sure that you mean these words as you sing them.” I came to realize last night that sometimes you may think, with the most pure heart, that you mean the words without really KNOWING that you mean them. You may have no way of really knowing if you mean them.
We sing, “Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders, let me walk upon the waters, wherever you may call me. Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander” That is a request. We ask for it over and over when we sing that song. But, do we really mean it? Or is out border crossed when an earthquake hits? Is that where our trust meets its limit? Is that too deep? Do we get upset with God for answering that request and bringing us to a place that demands our trust and faith in him to be made stronger?
“I will call upon your name and keep my eyes above the waves. When oceans rise my soul will rest in your embrace.” Do we really mean that? When we sing those words, we are making a commitment to God. Do we back out of that commitment when the ocean rises higher than we would like? Those waves could look like anything. Are we blindly willing to promise that response without knowing how big the waves will be and when they will rise?
I had to ask myself all of these questions as in listened to this song again in light of what I had just gone through.
It was the scariest thing that I have experience and there are no promises that things far worse won’t come my way. They most likely will. But God is sovereign which is the most comforting thing that I can think of. In those moments God wrapped his arms around me, I rested in his embrace as he reminded me of his promises and of his truth. He reminded me of all of the times he has come through for me…which is every time.
“He’s never failed and he won’t start now!”
I will continue to sing that song and really, truly mean it!
*Link to “Oceans”: http://youtu.be/dy9nwe9_xzw
