There's a song about giving it all away to Christ. So many of us sing these songs about giving it all to God, about sacrificing it all, but are we really willing to do that? Are we willing to abandon dreams, things, life, and relationships all in pursuit of Christ? All with the hope of growing closer to Him, will we truly give it up? Will we give it all to Him when He ask for ALL of it? Not some of it… but ALL of it.
The other day in my quiet time I was reading about Abraham and Isaac. Abraham had been promised Isaac. He had prayed for Isaac. He had shed tears for Isaac. Isaac was not just Abraham's son he was a promise and a dream given to Abraham by God. Then in one moment God asked Abraham to sacrifice his son. There are so many things that you can parallel this story to but today I want to parallel it to dreams and promises from God.
So often we have God-birthed dreams. We have things God has promised us. Dreams and promises that we have prayed over, cried over, sweated over and fought for. These things God has promised for us yet, they are taking time to fulfill. Abraham was promised son when he was known as Abram. His wife still known as Sarai was desperate for a child. So she took matters into her own hands. She had Abram sleep with her maid so that they could have a child through those means. How often do we do that? How often do we feel like it's taking to long for our dreams and promises that God has made to us too long to come tor fruition? How often do we try and find a way around His timing and try to make them happen on our own? Hagar (Sarai's maid) had a son, but this was not the son God had promised Abram. Abram was 86 when this happened.
Fastforward 13 years, now Abram is 99. God still has given this promise and dream to Abram. At 99 you have to thing Abram was starting to worry. He know's his wife has lost sleep over this. Honestly, I suspect Abram had too. This was a God-birthed dream. A dream Abram wanted. God had promised to multiply him, to give him a son, yet it still had not happened. So Abram's 99 and God is like, "Hey, remember the promise and dream I gave you years ago?" He then renewed this dream and promise in Abram and changed his name and made a covenant with Him about this dream, that Abraham would have a family. He changed Sarai's name to Sarah. He told him that they would have a child of their own not one born to them through Sarah's maid. Sarah was going to be 90 and Abraham is turning 100. They've dreamt this dream for years, and yet it still hasn't come to pass. Fastforward a bit more and Isaac is finally born. This gift from God. This dream from God, this promise from God is born.
Now let's skip a head, Isaac is growing up fast, he's no longer a baby but becoming a strong young man. God comes to Abraham and says, "You know this boy, this promise, this dream I have given to you? I need you to sacrifice him before me." God literally wanted Abraham to sacrifice his child. Abraham knew God was, is, and always will be a good God. So he agreed. I have to think there was every part of him fighting this. He knew it needed to be done. He has to obey God for disobedience is far scarier than obedience. Abraham walked Isaac up the mountain to sacrifice, telling Isaac God would provide the sacrifice (knowing that it meant Isaac) what is so cool is we know the end of the story. After God saw Abraham's willingness to sacrifice his son, his dream, his promise, he provided a ram for them to sacrifice. This was only provided after Abraham had already sacrificed Isaac in his heart, and had physically put him in the place of sacrifice.
Now I'm not saying we are all called to sacrifice our dreams, or promises God has given us, nor am I saying go sacrifice your kids. What I am saying is there are seasons and times when God calls us to sacrifice. We have to be willing to put our dreams on the alter and sacrifice them before the Lord. That is what happened to me this month. God asked for all of my dreams, all of the promises I felt He's given me. He wanted ALL of them. I had to make the choice. He asked me to write them all down, to give them all to Him. I wrote them all down. He asked me to take a social media fast and not talk to family or friends for 48 hours, not on Facebook, e-mail, or Skype. This was so hard. It's not something I wanted to do, but I wanted to be obedient and I knew it needed to happen. During that time God reminded me of a few things I needed to give up. Some of these required a more proactive stance.
I've chosen to obey. I say that not to toot my own horn or say look at me but to give you an idea of where I'm at. I laid down my dreams of family, marriage, career, adopting, fostering, where I would live. All of these, I'm giving to God. Since that day last week, I've struggled with some dreams like marriage and family I realized how much they meant to me. I know God will give me new dreams and reignite old ones in His timing, not my own time. He has given me back marriage and a family. As I was praying on Thursday, I was specifically praying about this and God reminded me how often I joke about not marrying or having a family. He asked me if I really desired them. He told me He disired them for me too… but that they were not to be taken lightly. (So mom don't worry I will get married and have a family – someday you'll get grandbabies.)
What all this means, I don't know. I don't know what new dreams God will give me. I don't know what my life looks like at the end of this 11 months. All I do know is my dreams belong to God. They are His promises for me to recieve in His timing. I will give it all to Him and wait on Him.
