The last Sunday here I gave a teaching on my month in Rwanda. To be honest, it was a tough one. Don’t get me wrong, our living arrangements were incredible. I was surrounded by the countries beauty and all its thousands of hills. Papa Robert and his family were simply phenominal serving us left and right. I have never felt more part of a family away from the states than here. Then there were Robert’s friends and neighbors who payed for our volcano journey and served us meals left and right.
Momma and Papa showering us with blessings
However, to me, it seemed like I was simply stranded in a desert. I felt so far from Papa and that He was not speaking to me. Day after day, I dug into His word wanting to know more about Him. BUT there were no revelations. Lies overtook my mind. I felt desperate, like giving up for a few days. All the while thinking that I was not allowed to be in this place, He showed me that I was. He took me to Ecclesiastes 3-“A Time For Everything”. We all go through different seasons in our lives and that is okay. It was okay that I was in this season of giving up and feeling far from God. He actually knew it was coming. I now realize that my love tank was running low. I just needed to be reminded of His great love for me.
after church one rainy sunday
In spite of feeling so far from Papa, He reminded me of His truths in His Word. Not only that He placed people in my life. For instance, Erin and myself were walking to the market on our day off. No sooner did we reach the top of our hill that Papa placed a man in our path. We saw a man walking with a limp and knew God wanted to heal him. Sure enough we stopped and prayed for Claude’s leg. He had had some messed up surgeries that had left him with a limp. Even though his leg didn’t get healed right on the spot, Papa used that to open up doors. He began to ask questions about God. Because there was a language barrier, we took him to our sister church, which just happened to be on our way to the market. Funny thing is that we just met with the Pastor of that church two days prior. We hooked Claude up with one of the Women Pastors there who spoke French. Then we said our goodbyes and were on our way.
After we passed the bus stop, we came upon this little boy who was hungry. With no hesitation, we began walking with our new friend Nic, who wore the largest smile ever. He was a ten year old homeless boy dressed in dirty clothes. Erin grabbed his bag from him and carried it on our journey to the market. It was full of his clothes and a few waters. This was all he had.
We proceeded to stop off at a store and bought him some food. Funny thing was that he barely got anything. Humble little fellow. So we put the stuff in his bag and continued on our journey. We put our waters in his bag so he could have some for later. Finally, we arrived at the people’s market. Because we did not speak the language, we tried to find people to help translate for us. We came upon this one woman dressed in fine clothing. We asked her if she could help. Right then and there she looked the child up and down with disgust and said no. No! Anger arose inside of me.
Next, we came upon this group of people who were sitting down. They began to speak to the boy, but would not translate anything to us. Crowds and crowds of people surrounded us. All were talking at the boy. There was no help, just chastisement. Of course the boy was hungry. There is no need to flaunt it in his face. I had enough of these people. So Erin grabbed his hand and we whisked him away. We came upon another stand and the same thing happend. Frustration. I grabbed his hand this time and took him to another stand; upon which, we bought him some dried fish. Then he left us.
Papa’s neighbor’s Zorlfa and Abdula who made us lunch
In the midst of me feeling so far from God, he used me. HE USED ME TO BE LIKE JESUS. He used me to show love to His children, Claude and Nic. Papa had prepared the way previous days for Claude to come to this church. He made sure we brought waters with us so we could give them away. I realized that buying food for those in need was more important than a pair of chuck taylor’s. He put these people in my path to show me how much HE LOVES ME. In those times when I feel so far from God, reality is that that is when He is the closest to me. His love never fails.
