Reading the Ragamuffin Gospel by Brennan Manning, and it's awesome- one o' those books I'll have to read several times before it really sinks in, like this paragraph:
" We all have shadows and skeletons in our backgrounds. But listen, there is something bigger in this world than we are and that something bigger is full of grace and mercy, patience and ingenuity. The moment the focus of you life shifts from your badness to his goodness and the question becomes not "what have I done?" but "what can he do?" release from remorse can happen; miracle of miracles, you can forgive yourself because you are forgiven, accept yourself because you are accepted, and begin to start building up the very places you once tore down. There is grace to help in every time of trouble. That grace is the secret to being able to forgive ourselves. Trust it."
I really love that+seriously have to read truth like it everyday…
Anyways, I wrote this thing, don’t really know what it is, but some of it’s semi-rhyme-y/ poem-esque, and some of it kind of reminds me of a song maybe. It’s just a bunch of verses, ideas, and stuff I’ve gotten from other books put together that helps get my mind where it should be, so read ‘em and weep:
Abba I belong to You, I repeat again and again.
How great is the love You have lavished that we should be called your children
Help me overcome my unbelief to know that is who I am, that is who I am
Not that we loved God, but that He loved us
Thank God He remembers that we are dust
Because the darkness is passing and the true light is already shining-
Shining through my pit, my mess, my sin, and my shame.
Thank you that You’re greater than our hearts- I pray mine won’t be the same.
Already I see the good that only You can bring from such bad.
Already You’re healing the ones who’ve been Had.
Doesn’t matter where I’ve been or what I’ve done- I’m defined solely in Christ.
Through sacrifice I’m a child of God bought with a price.
I sat in darkness- a prisoner suffering in chains from my rebellious ways
But You sent forth Your word to heal me, You rescued me from the grave.
I drew near the gates of death and rebelled against Your words
You brought me out of the deepest gloom with Your still small voice that needed heard
I have done all this evil, but the Lord was pleased to make me His own
Abraham’s faith was credited to him as righteousness; those words are not for him alone.
Help me see that the true light is already shining when it seems like the darkness doesn’t pass
With Him is full redemption- O Lord, redeem my past.
Purify me, free me, dress my wounds-
Take off my grave clothes because
Abba I belong to You, Abba I belong to You
He who has been forgiven little loves little, Jesus help me love much-
Help me know my many sins have been forgiven and I’m healed by only Your touch.
You tell me everything I’ve ever done and still Your grace lets me trade my shame for dignity
Have mercy on me, a sinner, and please exchange my ashes for beauty.
You ask, “Where are they?” and say, “Neither do I condemn you”
Help me to go now and leave my life of sin because
Abba I belong to You, Abba I belong to You.
I know what I once was and that’s what some of us were-may I never forget where I’ve been.
But I’m washed, sanctified, justified- Lord please bind what’s broken.
We are from God, we have a hope to get back what’s been thieved
The One who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world, Abba Father, set us free.
I lift up my cup of salvation because the One who calls me is faithful-
He gives life to the dead, and calls things that are not as though they were.
He is the One who guides, leads, comforts, rescues and restores
The One who shows me the thing in my right hand is a lie and makes my deluded heart pure.
Nothing is too hard for You, the Comforter to all who mourn
May your truth mend, renew, and rebuild what the lies have torn.
I think I knew that where the Spirit of the Lord is there is freedom, but I would have none of it
Thank you Lord, that it’s not the healthy who need a doctor, but that you came for the sick.
Abba I belong to You, Abba I belong to You
What Satan intended for evil You have renewed
You don’t punish me as my sins would deserve- You’re my only refuge.
By Your grace I’m somehow still useful to You
With a hope and a future to rebuild the ancient ruins and become something new.
I don’t want to fall into another pit again, help me hold onto nothing but You-
I want no confidence in my flesh, rip out my pride, let me let you wash me because
Abba I belong to You, Abba I belong to You.
