Forget the former things;do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?
Isaiah 43:18-19
When we look back on our lives, what we often remember most are the crazy things we did, the times we worked a little harder to make a day stand out. Good stories contain memorable scenes but sometimes we have to make an extra effort to create these scenes.
An extra effort to fully invest ourselves in the situation we are in.
The beautiful land of Nepal- I was counting down the months until we got here. But then the time came; we finally landed. And although I immediately fell in love with the wonderful family my team is living and working with for the month and the fact that you can see the Himalayas from our window, I quickly realized that I actually did not want to be here at all.
I think it was the result of a combination of things. It was partially that I needed a break from my team- the same five girls that I had spent all day every day with for the past four months. And because I was homesick due to the holidays starting and realizing that it would be the first year without my mom’s heart-shaped birthday muffins. Or perhaps because I’m still sick and my nose has yet to stop bleeding since arrival. All I know is that whatever it was killed any desire of mine to be here.
But luckily I can only handle being a complete butthead for so long. Because as I avoided everyone with my permanently attached headphones and wallowed in misery, I realized the ramifications of what I was doing. I was in NEPAL- I had nothing to be a baby about. And so I decided to suck it up and stop being bitter. I could choose to be joyful.
But I still kept praying for a comfort from home; I just needed something to help me out.
For ministry this month, my team is teaching various subjects to kindergartners through eighth graders. (And by various, I mean really various. I have taught five-year-olds how to play duck-duck-goose; multiple Math, Science, Health, Social Studies, cursive, and English classes; and the entire school the Wobble, Electric Slide, and Macarena). And as I walked into my first class that first day, since I had stopped being so self-involved, I was able to quickly realize how my prayer had been answered. Because in the middle of all of the five-year-olds, there he sat- the Nepali version of my nephew Nolan. He looked like Nolan, he laughed just like Nolan, he had the same mannerisms as Nolan. No kid will ever be Nolan, but for the time being, this was pretty good. And I immediately loved him. And due to him continually choosing me as goose, I am telling myself that he loved me back. I know it may sound small but it was exactly what I needed.
So in addition to learning that Nepali second graders think dinosaurs still exist in America, that I cannot always recall our national anthem on cue, and how much kids really appreciate the Macarena, I was also reminded of the importance of fully investing myself to where I am at the time. And more importantly, that even when I am sucky that God still loves me, that he is faithful, and that he will not give up on me.
God answers prayers; he will help create memorable scenes—you just have to make the extra effort to notice.
