I was thinking and processing a lot of things yesterday.
I read Joshua about a year ago and have not been able to get that book
out of my mind. I have also been obsessed with this idea of obedience
as a lifestyle. Obedience always makes me think of Joshua. Always.
Joshua was chosen by God to finish the work that he gave to Moses.
Joshua got to lead his people into the Promised Land. But there were
people living in it, right? It wasn’t just waiting for them with open
arms . They had to fight for it. But God had promised it to them. He
promised Joshua the victory numerous times. He always told him not to
be afraid or discouraged. He promised to be with him…ALWAYS. All
Joshua had to do was go fight and claim victory that was already his .
Isn’t it the same with us? We are promised the victory. We have the
keys to the Kingdom of Heaven. We are citizens of Heaven. We are all
the rights and privileges of a citizen of HEAVEN. We are FREE in Jesus
name. The victory is ours. Our fight is different than Joshua’s
fight. Our fight is more internal. But we have the victory
nonetheless. We have it, but we still have to fight for it. We don’t
just immediately get freedom . We have to fight for it. We have to
work for it. And how do we do that?
Through OBEDIENCE!!!!!
We can’t be obedient without faith. We can’t jump off the crazy cliff
if we don’t believe that our Dad will catch us if we fall. He has our
name written on the palm of his hand. His love covers and protects
us. He will NOT lead us into death and despair. He can’t. His nature
is LOVE. He is love and he is light. There is no death, despair, or
darkness in light. When we act in accordance with his will, then how
in the world can anything bad happen? I have to change my mind. I
have to change my perspective. If I fall into this amazing love…if I
REALLY get it…then I’ll have no fear. 🙂 I can’t wait for that!!
I’ve also been thinking a LOT about sacrifice.
I preached on the story of the rich man in Matthew 19.
He was told to sell all of his possessions to enter the Kingdom. Huh.
He was looking for a list to check off. He was looking for things he
could perform to get to Heaven. Jesus knew his heart. Jesus also knew
that you can’t DO anything to get to Heaven. You can’t EARN your
salvation. It isn’t found through what you DO. It is found with what
you BELIEVE…with what you TRULY BELIEVE in your heart . If your hope
is in your possessions, then you can’t sell them. You would be
devastated and lost. But if your hope is in Christ…then what do
possessions matter???
So I preach this message of sacrifice. We should be ready to give it
all up for the sake of following Christ. Take up your cross. Turn
from your selfish ways. Leave it all behind. Don’t look back. I was
trying to challenge the congregation to go live the message they
believe.
So the thing about preaching something is that often, God will teach it to you. Well, that is exactly what happened.
I started realizing what I have sacrificed. I saw the weight of it. I
don’t know if I’m going back to work as a teacher…ever again. I
don’t know where I will live. I don’t know what my address will be. I
don’t know where my money is coming from. I don’t know what is
happening in the lives of people I love. I don’t know when I will get
to see my family again. I don’t know if I’ll be able to go to my
brother’s wedding. I don’t know anything. I
have to depend ONLY on the Lord. And EVERYTHING inside of me wants to
run to the comfort and security of the American Dream. Get a job.
Provide for yourself. Suck it up and pull it together. You want
something, you work for it and go get it. But then my security is no
longer in my Father, but in my things, my job, my money, my friends, my
family…etc. God wants my security to be in Him. That is dang hard.
I have a lot of “small” decisions to make in the month that I’ll be
back in the States. Small decisions with HUGE implications. I thought
I left it all behind. I thought I abandoned my life. But I
didn’t…not REALLY. I left it in order so I could go back to it. And
now…now I’m supposed to really leave it. And it is scary but
exciting at the same time. There is a huge battle going on in my
mind…I want God to win. I want to lose. I want to lose my life. I
can’t find it until I lose it…like REALLY lose it and not just
misplace it for a while. But that’s real scary.
I got a word the other day…Amanda – you are open to the things of the
Spirit, but you are treading on the top layers . You don’t trust. You
have to DIVE DEEP.
That is what I desire…
