This past week has been a very busy week for me. I just moved home to the parent’s house which has been interesting and a blessing in many ways. My younger sisters are wonderful to be around, as are my parents. It is a good environment to rest in before taking off soon. My parents’ nonprofit organization, Ukraine Orphan Outreach, had a celebration dinner this last Tuesday night which brought such joy to me. To see all of the children that have been adopted, still talking in their adorable Ukrainian accents with one another, being loved on by this community that Father has created in Northern Colorado. My parents are like a bolder, that has been dropped into the pond of orphan awareness, and Tuesday night was a great visual of the massive ripples God has used them for. I am so thankful for the example they lead in serving the least of these, and following the calling that Father has laid on their hearts.
I underestimated all of the preparations that needed to go into a trip like this. Materially, I need all of the appropriate supplies that are light weight, pack well, and fit my new living situation needs. I financially need to be at $6,000 by August 18th, to launch with my team, and am
THANKFULLY at $8,885.59!!! I emotionally have been realizing more and more what I will be missing of my life here in these 11 months; birthdays, Christmas, weddings, and the hardest one so far has been the season of fall (odd, I know). Spiritually, I have been diving deeper than I have ever known God to be, and finding myself almost frustrated with how people around me live their lives, mixing up their wants – needs. God is working in me so much already, and I haven’t even left the country yet! I still have all of my same comforts, yet those are starting to feel uncomfortable, and I am ready to rid of them. I physically have been going through some crazy and unique food cravings, like French fries (which I hardly never eat), ice cream and cake every night (yum.. yet so gross), and sushi (delicious, yet special..). I feel like a pregnant woman!! This is how I think, subconsciously, I am trying to fatten up before I launch on September 6th. I want to get as much in as I can before taking off. But why? It all seems so selfish to me now that I am blogging and reflecting on it. Why do I need that extra serving when families all over the world are starving tonight? Why do I need a bowl of ice cream when some kids can’t even find clean drinking water? The world is going to go around, and fall will be beautiful like always, followed by winter and spring. My family will all turn one year older without me here. And all will be well.
I remember during training camp, while all of us are secretly (or not so secretly) starving, and contemplating if we are going to spend the next month or so before launch indulging in as much as we can, or trying to wean ourselves off of the things we love to prepare ourselves for the 11 months ahead. I figured that since I didn’t treat myself often anyways it wouldn’t be a problem, but now I believe it goes a little deeper than just craving a DQ blizzard.
When I say “I surrender all I am to you Lord”, do I mean it? Do I mean that I can sacrifice all that I have and all that I want for Him? I freaken hope so, but am struggling with… am I at that place?
I am having my going away party tomorrow night at Five Stones Student Center (770 N 2nd Street, from 5-8pm) here in Berthoud. We are going to have spaghetti, bread, salads and dessert for everyone, AND I will be buzzing all of my hair off. Father laid it on my heart to do this, and I am doing it. I am not my hair, and I want this to be a constant reminder for me to surrender all that I want/need/am to the ONE who truly cares for me and knows my best interests. I hope that you will be able to join us all tomorrow night, and be a part of this freeing experience with me. THANK YOU ALL for the support you have given thus far – Father is smiling at us all.