The next few blogs will be about my experience at training camp.
I wrote this one the other day and thought about not posting it. It doesn't feature my good side 🙂 but it does show how well God knows me and also how aware the Spirit makes me of my flesh.
I’ve told stories to friends of training camp over the past week or so. When asked how it was, I was usually stuck for a few seconds trying to find the words. Any emotion or adjective could and would be fitting. A safe bet was the ever beloved pun that it was in[tents]. But it was so many other things too.
I’ll do my best to be brief [haha – we all know it’s not possible] and share the highlights, lowlights and leave the in-between a mystery for the sake of future racers.
With that being said – if you are a future racer – Read blogs, let them minister to your heart, and get you pumped. But also be completely aware that your experience is yours. Designed to fit you, the race, camp and your fundraising experience, really, the whole gamut; God has something completely different for each one of us to learn from each part. Why would God call you to a cookie cutter experience? So read the blogs, but don’t read into them. Leave room for God to move beyond your expectations. And better yet, drop them.
I boarded the plane to Atlanta slightly apprehensive. I was excited for the week, but also knew the week was designed with my weakness in mind. And I do a really good job of trying to hide all that. It is easy to say the right things. While I pride myself on being real and authentic, I also know that in that I carry a false pride for one, and the ability to chameleon for two. Knowing that training camp was going to be intentional in every way to reach into the depths of my heart and soul and bring to light so much of the junk I have been carrying around did not exactly make me want to jump headfirst into the activities.
I landed in Atlanta, and maneuvered my way to the atrium, intent on grabbing a bite to eat and secluding myself for the next few hours. An energetic voice called after me.
“Hey are you with the World Race?”
Instantly, I was met with my flesh. I just want to be left alone, already this is starting out not my way. This guy is really peppy. Definitely a high I on the DISC scale, or he’s just as nervous as I am. I’m wondering what gave it away. Was it the massive pack hanging off of my back?
“We’re all sitting over there if you want to join”
He probably sensed the hesitancy in my response, because he gave me an out to go and sit somewhere else if I wanted to be alone, but also an enthusiastic welcome to join the other group of racers slowly building in the seating area around me. I cringed when I saw the group growing larger, all of the Military’s ingrained Operational Security made me want to move away quickly. That and probably the self-awareness that comes from living in a large, transient family. But something made me join the group – probably the voice that told me all of my above musings were not right, and that this trip is not about me, nor will it be normal.
If anything, they can all watch my bags while I wander around later.
I sat for the next few hours – waiting for Adventures Staff to come and pick up our massive group – moving around various chairs, interacting with those around me and also retreating into my shell. The introvert in my was definitely begging for a break and I sat for some time simply watching others interact. I don’t have Facebook and found that my anonymity among both my old squad and my new one annoying and yet refreshing too. I had several good conversations and met some great people. And credit goes to Papa who knows that it was better for me to sit amongst the racers, meeting others even in such a large group. That I could still have the intimacy with Him in those moments when I was simply observing others. And I found myself, truly meeting people, without the preconceived ideas of how people were based upon a profile picture.
We rolled into camp and I was still overwhelmed. We took the Meyers –Briggs test prior to arriving at camp and thought it was a mistake when my profile said that I was an extrovert. I think I can switch it on or off. But know that I am refueled by quiet moments in coffee shops, with journals and the aroma of coffee swirling around my nose. I am refueled by long runs on the trails with small moments of bliss when God chooses to romance me with silent deer and tranquil sunsets over my beloved home of Lynchburg. I claim my bread and butter to be found in one on one conversations, that could travel for hours from one topic to the next. So camp with 215 racers, 51 on my squad, and so many alumni and staff was much more than for what I could have ever been prepared.
[Shout out to Phil, Chandler, The Rutans, Kayley, Shannon, Amy and others that I met at the airport – I was stretched from the get go, but I truly enjoyed talking with you all. Thanks for letting me talk when I was ready, and be quiet when I needed to be. I loved being able to say hi all week long! I'm excited to see how God moves among your squads this year.]
