I don’t really understand what’s going on with me right now. I am moody and upset and happy and grumpy and loving and mean all at the same time. I feel like a lot of things are falling apart in my life.
Maybe who I am is falling apart, or is it who I was? Is it just that God is making me into someone new and I’m having a hard time adjusting to myself?
Change is hard for me. I like getting settled in a place, you know, really make the space your own. I like having familiarity but I also enjoy new things. Newness brings life and excitement. I think that’s why I decided to go on the World Race.
I’m out exploring the world.
Ooo…doesn’t that just sound great? …like I’m some kick-butt pioneer or something, makes me sound like I know what I’m doing, with not a care in the world, going off to ‘really find myself’ or something.
Seven months into this thing I can unquestionably say that I do not know what I’m doing. Sure I can find my way through a city of 10 million people if I happen to get lost (check out my blog on this), but really I don’t have things all together. And I really do believe there’s something to this ‘finding yourself’ as my family refers to my travels.
When I left to go on the race I didn’t think I had to go find myself. In reality, I thought I was found. I thought I was fine. I thought I was going on the race to find out about the world, get some experience under this young belt of mine, get a little broken in, harden up, see the “real world.” Yes, I can now say I’ve seen the world, been on every continent except Australia and Antarctica and could give you a years worth of amazing stories about all of our travel exploits. All this aside, I could probably fill more pages than all of these stories combined simply with what God has done
in me…
This blog is the first of a three part series. For the rest of the story please click here: World Racer Uprooted: Part 2 and World Racer Uprooted: Part 3
