So it begins…
The blogging process to be is very foreign and strange o me. It does not come natural nor am I even a decent writer so bare with me if you continue to follow these. My hope is that you will hear me as though we are just chilling and processing these things together.
So here it is the first week of February, I was accepted into the world race (WR) back in November, and I’ve hardly begun to fundraise. OUCH. I completely wasted away a whole 4 months of prep-time. WHO DOES THAT?? I ask myself continuously “What’s stopping me?” here’s what conclusions I have drawn…
Is it the unfathomable amount of money I need to raise?
I John 5:14-15; Matt 7:7-8; Both remind me that if I ask according unto the Lord’s will then I will receive. “Will” is a word that means a sure thing, not “maybe” or “might”. Jesus has made it very clear that this is his current calling for me so I can sleep with confidence knowing that he will provide.
Do I feel guilty or undeserving in regards to asking for others to fund me?
Romans 12: 4-8 states that every member in the body has a calling and a role. Some are called to serve and teach while others contribute in generosity. “In generosity” can all be read as “with great joy”. I can’t waste time feeling guilty about the gift/role that God has given my brothers and sisters especially when it brings them great joy.
Have I been discouraged by the nay-sayers?
Romans 8:31 If he is for us than who can be against us. For crying out loud I have the almighty creator of mountains and galaxies, the conductor of the weather and the designer of all living things on my side!!! My battle has already been won.
The road block I’m at now is that if I know the above truths to be true then why am I still standing on the bank of the Jordan waiting to take the first step. I like the children of Israel have been promised a destination and a clear path has been laid out before me. Unfortunately the path isn’t a nice neat trail but rather a raging sea. You see taking that first step into the water would be giving up all control. The preparation alone is an incredible task from blogging and raising support, getting vaccinations and passports, buying supplies and paying off bills etc. it goes on and on. My only option is to give God control because I either won’t do this with out him or I won’t be doing it at all. Sounds like the decision to step aside would be a no brainer right? Unfortunately no. I have become a custom to making everyday decisions with out consulting God knowing in the back of my mind that he was working on “something bigger”. It never occurred to me that this “something bigger” would be happening when I least expected it to. I figured I would be more stable and ready. I figured I would just hand over the reins. Oddly enough it doesn’t come as natural as I thought. It’s so easy to fight little battles in my own strength and then “selflessly” credit the Almighty. Showing up to a full fledged war unarmed and saying “Let’s do this!” that is what true faith looks like. Allowing the Lord to be my protector and my source of valor is what’s gonna get me on this race. Over the years I have seen enough to know better than to let anyone or anything stand in the way of what God has planned for me and I myself am no exception.
This is me putting my toes in the water, I can only take one step at a time but I’m finally ready to watch him clear the path.
