Boy has this year been a wild one. Plans have constantly changed for me. Change can be hard, no matter what it is. But if we choose to adapt and trust in the process, it tends to make it a little easier. This year has brought on so many challenges but I’ve grown and leaned so much and I’m grateful for that. I’ve had to make a lot of hard decisions. One of them being deferring my trip until next August. While it breaks my heart that I will not be leaving in a couple short weeks to serve alongside the beautifully crafted team of H Squad, I am still thrilled to partner with each of my squadmates and watch the ways they work for the kingdom.
Why did I defer my trip you might be wondering? Well at first from a practical standpoint, I did not reach my fundraising goal. I prayed every day and did what I could to make it happen but the funds just weren’t coming in. I knew that the Lord was so capable of getting me to my goal overnight and it just didn’t happen. And secondly from a spiritual standpoint, I did not feel equipped or ready to go. For some reason I felt a tug to stay. I felt like such a failure at first, that I didn’t do enough or work hard enough or somehow I messed up God’s plan for me. How silly is that to think I actually have the power to mess it up?! I ultimately felt peace after making the decision that I was not yet ready to launch. I gave myself grace because this year has been HARD y’all. And I am faithfully trusting that new opportunities will come my way in the next ten months before my August 2021 race.
Within the past week the Lord has already closed so many doors for me while I try to find a new place to live. Each day he closes a door and I say okay not that one Lord, and I try a different one. One of these days I’ll walk through the right one and all of this uncertainty will make sense. Because He knows something that I don’t know and I am choosing to trust in His faithfulness. Because I know I am worthy of a good thing and He is a good good Father who provides for me. What a beautiful process of learning that truth.
I will be doing more fundraisers at the start of the new year to continue toward my new goals for my new race! And will be writing more blogs with more details on the new trip! Thank you so much to everyone who has supported me in prayer, encouragement and funds. I am excited to share my next adventure with you! Until next time!
xoxo Alyssa
