THOUGHTS: October 22nd, 2017. Haiti.
I listened to a podcast today for church. It was freaking INSANE. Blew my mind. Convicted me SO MUCH.
People in other countries thirst to know and listen to the Word of God. But, often times, they don’t even have access to it. They don’t even have the ability to search the word and hide it in their hearts because they don’t have the word.
I have like 5 bibles of my own. In my house, we probably have at least 15. 15 BIBLES AND I HAVEN’T EVEN READ THROUGH AN ENTIRE ONE BEFORE. I preach life and good news to people, but do I even know the fullness of what that good news is? How can I possibly give hope to people when I don’t fully and truly know that hope?
Gosh. That is so convicting. Why don’t I take the time to read the Bible? Why don’t I spend more time in the Word? I spend so much time worrying and wondering how to walk through life but don’t ever take steps to LEARN. All of the answers that I need are found in the Bible but I don’t ever turn to it… Why? Why wouldn’t I want to know how to walk through life? Why wouldn’t I want to live to the fullest potential? Why wouldn’t I want to learn? Why wouldn’t I want to know God more?
The Bible isn’t a boring, dusty, old history book. It’s an adventure. It’s a story; and it’s a story worth READING.
So many times, I’ve asked the Lord to bring me closer to Him. I think a lot of people ask that. But rarely did I ever TURN TO THE WORD. It had all of the answers. It’s LITERALLY God SPEAKING to me. But I never turned to it. I turned to sermons and the internet and little quotes that didn’t actually help me. The truth was sitting right on my bedside table, but I never took the time to search it out. I never disciplined myself enough.
I need the Word. I need to know it. I need to read it. I need to understand it. I need to meditate on it. I need to talk about it. Not to have a relationship with it, not to gain righteousness from it, but to know how to live. To know how to live in the world, but not of the world. To gain a better relationship with the God that I claim to know and love. But do I really know him? Do I really know this God of the Bible that I’ve given my life to? Or is it just the American God; is it just the God that is compressed and constricted by my labels and limited thinking? Is it all just surface-level stuff?
Read the word just to read it. Worship just to feel better. Talk about it just because that’s what I’m supposed to do. Or do I actually, truly, believe and know this God? Do I desire to know more than what I do now?
I was talking to a couple of my squad mates – Nick and Noah – during our off day last week. Blew my mind. Made me realize that I don’t really know God as much as I thought I did. But I want to.
All that I know now seems so shallow. So surface level. I don’t even know God because I haven’t made it a priority TO know him. Conviction, conviction, conviction.
How much of a box have I packed the Lord into? How much did I limit Him but was unaware (or super aware)? How much of God have I blocked out because I haven’t shown the desire to know him more? How many times have I ignored God? How many times have I limited him due to my own unbelief?
Do I even really know God, or just the American God? Do I just know the God who I’ve put a bunch of labels on? Or do I know the truth of who God is?
He is so much greater than I know, even now. But I want to know. I want to learn. I want to fall more deeply in love with my Savior. No more surface level. I wanna go deeper. SO much deeper. Rely on him. Yearn for him. Cherish the Word like gold. Pure gold. I can’t know the truth if I don’t read the truth.
The Bible isn’t just this boring little book filled with ancient people.
Ugh. So many thoughts. So many things that the Lord is doing in my heart.
I want to read the Bible front to back by the end of this Race. Will I actually? I sure hope so. If I choose it.
Quite honestly, I didn’t want to post this blog because I didn’t want to make that promise. I didn’t want that accountability. But, I need it. Please keep me accountable. Remind me to stay in the Word. Remind me to read and dig deeper into discovering who the Lord is through Scripture.
I want to know God more. I want to have the desire to seek out his word and WHO HE REALLY IS. Not who I’ve cooked up in my mind. I want the truth. I want to know the real God and not the American God. I want reality. I want to know you, Jesus. Truly, really, know and love you.
-Lyss
