If you had asked me when I graduated high school where I thought I was going in life it would have looked like this:
I'll go to U of I and meet the friends I'll have for the rest of my life. I will probably also meet my husband there, but if I don't, I'll meet him right after in the working world. I would have graduated in four years with a degree in social work. I will probably only work for a few years, because I would be married and want to start having kids by then. When they were little I would stay home with them and when they started school I would find a job with great hours so I could work while being a present mom. My family and I would live close to my mom, sisters, and cousins so I would have everyone I loved around me. We would have a nice house, be able to go on vacation, and live happily every after.
Basically my life would have been wrapped up in a white picket fence. I was perfectly okay with that. But God has other plans. I did go to U of I, while I was there I slept through my classes during the day and went out at night. It only lasted a semester. When I came home I felt totally lost. At 18 if you mess up college your life is over right? That is how it felt for quite some time. I was not close to God at the time in my life and for a while I just felt like I was floundering.
When I was about 21 I started getting back into church and eventually God gave me an amazing community and I began to realize how much better His plan was than mine. This weekend my best friend of 23 years is getting married. I could not be more excited for her. But occasionally my plan starts to sneak back in my head. Shouldn't I be married by now? I am leaving for this amazing journey, but that will mean I will be 27 when I get back. When will I get married? What career am I going to start so I can buy a house? When will I have kids? This is when I need to take a deep breath and lay all my worries and concerns at God's feet.
His plan, not mine. His plan, not mine.
I might not get married, deep breath. I might not live close to my loved ones, deep breath. I might not have a white picket fence, deep breath not really necessary but you get my point. I just need to remember that no matter what happens when I follow His plan my life is infinitely better than when I follow my own.
