This is me. If you look you may just see the blue eyes, blond hair, and the white skin. But, underneath all that there is so much more. I don’t know what you see, but I can tell you what I use to see and what I see now. Can you tell any difference between the two pictures?
What I use to see:
I use to see a girl, not a women. I saw a shy, timid girl, not confident in the skills the Lord had given her. Scared to fully trust Him and be fully honest with others and herself of how she was doing. I thought that she wouldn’t go anywhere. I was convinced that she wouldn’t really do anything significant with her life. That her “glory” days were far behind her and what was ahead was just a wasted desert land, with no true path, just a possible dotted line on where to go. I didn’t see her as anyone significant. Just a girl with no real future and no direction of where to go…
…that all changed when I decided to dare to step into something new for me, something that scared me, made me so unsure and left me with more questions then answers….
…This step of faith that I took was the journey that I currently am on. My uncertainty has been calmed, and my fear turned into courage, my questions answered with new ones arising, but now I have so much more trust in the Lord and His plans in my life when I first began…
…when I started this journey in China, that first month was hard I was team leader, I was trying to live with new people and get use to this life that I would be living for the next eleven months. In China I was unsure of myself, weak almost frail. I thought that I wasn’t fit to lead a team and that I wasn’t really meant to be on the Race in the first place. Thankfully through the months of trials, challenges, joys, and love. Through the days, the hours, minutes and seconds, God has radically transformed me, he has refined me and shaped me into someone new…
…now I know that ALL of the things I believed before are lies of the enemy for he didn’t want me to step into the greatness that God has been calling me into. Now I am more confident in who I am and how God has created me to be….
What I see now:
I look and I see a leader, someone who can lead people into greatness. I am a bold and passionate women. I can speak and proclaim the Lord’s truth to others. I am unique in the Lord’s eyes and I am perfect in His sight. I am suppose to be here on this journey, this adventure. This is where the Lord has placed me. This is where he has molded me and shaped me. He has placed so many passions in me and has set a deep fire within my soul! Now I know I am fit for any job that the Lord gives me, for with him beside me I can do all things and I can rely on him for everything! I thought that I only had a few gifts but now I know that the Lord has blessed me with many gifts such as prophecy, listening, serving, shepherding, leadership, servanthood, and so much more. I am no longer a timid and shy little girl. I am now a woman of God, strong, determined and ready to go on any adventure that He may call me on!
I think that C.S. Lewis has put it best: “The more we let God take us over, the more truly ourselves we become-because he made us. He invented us. He invented all the different people you and I were intended to be. It is when I turn to Christ, when I give up myself to his personality, that I first begin to have a real personality of my own.”
God has made each and everyone of us unique and different. He has gifted us and blessed us with talents and abilities that we can harvest from him when we fully jump out of the boat and into the ocean of his love. We first need to take that step of faith out on the edge and then we just need to jump. We need to jump fully and completely, without hesitancy. He is there ready to transform you, to grow you and to mold you into the person he has always wanted you to be. Here is my question for you: are you ready to live with abandonment? Are you ready to be dangerous for God? To give him your full self? Because, he is always ready for you. He is ready to receive you with all his heart. He longs for his sons and daughters to come to him and transform their lives so that they may live out the destinies that he has always called them too. So are you ready to let God take you over?
