I sat alone in the exam room waiting for the village doctor to come in. The nurse was preparing the tools- the sound of metal clinking and the smell of alcohol filled the room. My contact’s husband stood nearby. I didn’t know what to expect, I didn’t know exactly what was wrong, I was the only one who spoke english. The nurse approached with a long needle and injected it into my foot….numbing the area. I gazed out the window at beautiful yellow flowers. It was at this time that I felt the most alone I have ever felt in my life. This last statement may sound slightly pathetic, but in truth God redeems all of these moments. It is at these times that we realize just how much we need God, how he is the only one true presence in our lives at all times. Let me backtrack a little….
A big part of our ministry this month was building a cement brick wall, at our contact’s ministry site. One of the days a cement brick (cinderblock) happened to tip over onto my foot, leaving an 
insignificant scratch. I had already had other cuts and blisters, from the work and just chalked it up as my ministry war wounds. The only thing was, all of these skin wounds were getting infected. Many a night, I would entertain the other girls with a hydrogen peroxide fizz session. Fast forward a week and a half later, after the foot incident…..
My foot was swelling up a lot and was becoming more and more painful. Not wanting to make a big deal……or secretly hoping it wouldn’t be a big deal, I kept ignoring it. Finally oneday, my contact’s husband Nan called me over. He noticed me limping around. Examining the issue, he proceeded to make a needle from a fern leaf and started digging around in the clearly infected wound. Realizing it was beyond his ability to help, he got me on the motorbike and took me to the village doctor. I was the only one who spoke English…..and I had no idea what they were about to do.
We sat with the nurse, who asked Nan a bunch of questions. She then handed me two sets of pills and took me into the exam room. After preparing the tray of surgical looking tools, she came at my 
foot with the needle. Then the doctor came in and began the procedure (I pulled out the flipcam to video the whole thing). The doctor cut the wound open farther and start digging around with a small spoon looking thing. I, to this day, don’t know if she was digging for infection or pieces of concrete. At some points there was minor pain, as she hit spots that were not numb. Nan watched…..looking a bit squeamish. She ended by stuffing gauze in the open wound and covering it up.
I went back for the next two days to have the gauze removed and more stuffed in. In the end I paid $6 for the entire 3 days. Kind of amazing if you ask me. I did, however go to Bangkok to get wound dressing supplies and a stronger antibiotic. Now, in Africa, I still have a hole in my foot with gauze sticking out of it. We change it each day and I wait for the infection to clear up.
It makes me reflect on all the issues I have had with my feet on this trip…..in the Philippines there was what we assumed was an achilles tendon problem and my left foot was in pain and swelling. Australia brought very sore feet from all the walking. Various other minor things happen and it makes me wonder if this is just the life of a servant. Our feet go many places and walk on all kinds of terrain. They get dirty, they get sore, they get photographed, they get blogged about often. They are truely the foundation to our physical bodies……what happens if they crumble?
I often think that this is a good simile to our faith in God. If that crumbles, well what do we have. How do we really live our life, make decisions, and find hope in situations. If our feet fail us, we are paralyzed in a way……we find certain crutches to help us walk. If we lose our faith, we are paralyzed……we try to use man-made crutches: relying on other people, substances, addictions, or other distractions. Eventually it gets tiring and even old…….they just aren’t as strong and reliable as the real deal.
So, a lot has happened to my feet on this trip and I had to start questioning why? Is my faith wavering? Am I relying on other things and distractions to carry me through the days? Have I stopped leaning on God’s love and truth…..stopped putting my full trust in his grace?
So, instead of looking at these incidents feeling sorry for myself……I thank God for little reminders of His amazing presence.
“How beautiful on the mountains are the feet of the messenger who brings good news, the good news of peace and salvation, the news that the God of Israel reigns!” Israel 52:7
(PS. Here is a link to the video of my surgery……..it’s pretty graphic, don’t watch if you get squeamish…….:) ).
