Ask me how I feel about this month……well I still don’t quite know. I know that God is in control and his hand is guiding the entirity of this 11 month adventure. I trust the choices that were made for this squad, because I know they were spirit led. Our squad leaders are strong in their Faith and are graced with discernment…..they are obedient to our Father and listen to his truth. Even though I believe this, there was still some grieving that had to happen. Grieving for what? A change of teams…..
The Philippines was by far my favorite month, probably for a number of reasons. We racers have grown in our walk in extreme ways, and began to see more fruit from our ministry. The Philippines allowed us to see poverty to the max, which broke our hearts…….we broke for what breaks Him. In this breaking we learned to rely more on the Holy Spirit to guide us and work through us. It was His words and His hands; it was by Faith that we trusted God to do works through us. The people were friendly, the fellowship awesome, and the dynamics seemed to just flow. My team had hit a strong point in our relationship and it was shining out into our ministry. Inevitably things changed……our World Race world as we knew it was turned upside down (something we knew could happen, we just weren’t expecting it so soon).
It became time for two new squad leaders, so that Robbie and Tara could move on. The choice for the new male leader was inevitable…..most of us on Team Ginosko knew in month 2 that it would be our amazing team leader Austin 
Robertson. He really is the right guy for this role and I am so proud of him….however it meant that Team Ginosko would break up.
I thought that I would be okay with the change, that I could focus on the beauty that would come out of it. I was wrong. Most people who know me, know I don’t cry very often…….yeah… I cried. My heart broke for my teammates…..my heart broke for this end to something that was so spiritually anointed. We had become a great family, completely comfortable with one another, and to a place of trust…..a safe place.
People said that they were inspired by our team’s spiritual dynamic, on how stong we were. They saw amazing things in us as a whole. Why break that up? If we were so mighty, wouldn’t that be better used to minister to the nations? So, I did have my “Why” syndrome for awhile, and still kind of do. I know that it is important to spread our gifts to the rest of the squad, to be placed where we could help strengthen other teams. That we, in turn, will also grow more in this change. I know that good will come out of it eventually, but I still grieve what was. I also know that this isn’t about me, that it’s about helping others, it’s about ministry. Who knew that this would hurt so bad?
So, here I am with my new team in Malaysia…..an all girls team: Tanna Burge (team leader), Susie Vrizi, Emily Conner, Jessica Austin , Sarah Schrack , and Ashley Huizenga. I see amazing things in all of them and powerful things that could happen as a group….it’s just hard. We haven’t had enough time to adjust or to get to know each other. We dived into ministry right away without much team bonding time…….and I think we are all still adjusting to the change (in different ways). For now, we patiently endure and pray through things. We strive to keep our vision clear from what was; and to keep focused on the present, on God’s purpose. It’s not about where we have been, it’s about where we are going. God is good and that’s enough to hold on to for now.
“And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.” Romans 8:28
