So on the race we live with a team of people 24/7. If you have ever lived with people, and I’m sure you have, you know that there is all sorts of dynamics to navigate. There are things that drive you crazy, but then there are other things that you cherish about people. We generally love the people we live with because if you didn’t, why are you still living with them? Yet how often do we ever tell these people what we love about them or the potential we see inside of them? I don’t mean saying a quick “I love you” or “You can do it” before walking out the door. In truth, I don’t think we say those things as often as we should.
On the flip side, how often do you wonder what people see in you or if you are really making a difference? If you’re female, this probably occurs more often then it should. If you’re male, I have no idea what you’re thinking, but I’m guessing it comes to mind. You may even find yourself asking, what am I good at? What is my purpose?
This is where feedback comes into play.
My team and I have this thing called feedback that we do on a daily basis. We all sit down, pray, and then sit quietly. As we sit, we think about the things we’ve noticed in other people’s lives. Then we each speak those things to the individuals around us. The goal in this isn’t to flatter each other or berate someone for what annoys you about them. The goal is for that person to look more like Christ and become the person God made them to be.
To do it successfully, you do it in love because you want to see the people around you to succeed. You don’t want anything to hinder them and you want to encourage them in the direction the Lord is leading them because they may not see it themselves. It’s like it says in Ephesians 4:15-16,
“but, speaking the truth in love, may grow up in all things into Him who is the head—Christ— from whom the whole body, joined and knit together by what every joint supplies, according to the effective working by which every part does its share, causes growth of the body for the edifying of itself in love.”
Does that sound confusing or wordy? I’m gonna share some of the feedback I’ve received in hopes to clarify.
“Allison, you have so much joy. It’s contagious and spreads to the people around you.”
“I want to challenge you to practice your guitar more so you can be more confident in leading worship”
“God has blessed you with a lot of direction. You tend to normally not walk in insecurities because you are aware of where you are headed because of what HE says.”
“You see things in black & white. Push outside of your comfort zone to see the grey.”
“You have a lot of really cool insight, gifts, and maturity. Spend more time growing in your disciplines and maturity.”
“Your words matter. Your conversations don’t need to be wrapped in niceties. You don’t have to wrap yourself in pretty wrapping before being offered to someone.”
Now you may be thinking, “Woah, people said those things to you?” Yes, and these are conversations that begin to happen naturally throughout the day. Before the race, I would be able to tell someone what I liked about them. However, I would never challenge people because what if they get upset and don’t want to be friends with me anymore? It may seem scary when you put yourself out there and risk the other person rejecting what you have to say. The thing is, you are only responsible to say what you’ve seen in order to build up the body of Christ like God asks you to.
Having a relationship where you can say things that may be hard or not received well is actually the safest place to be. You can trust those people and they’ve shown they love you and want what is best for you. It’s just like it says in Proverbs 27:6, “Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.” When someone is would rather tell you the truth than flatter you, they care about you more than they care about themselves.
That is what community and feedback is all about.
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I will be arriving home in a little over three short months. As I return, I will be living in Atlanta for a few months as I seek the next step the Lord wants me to take. I believe this will be moving overseas in some capacity. Please be praying for clear direction, provision, and patience as I seek the Lord in this.
If you would like to support me in this transition click here. Thank you!
