Today has definitely been the hardest day of the race for me so far. It was my first day of tearful goodbyes.
Yesterday and today we visited an orphan camp about an hour outside of Uzhgorod, where children from 4 different orphanages gather at 1 location in the summer. I believe there are about 200 of them, some who struggle with mild behavioral or mental disorders, and all of whom are precious. As soon as we drove up, they surrounded the bus and attacked us with hugs the moment we stepped off. Their desperation for attention and love was so evident, and it completely broke my heart.
Almost immediately yesterday, I bonded with a 9 year-old boy named Zolee. We played with a bouncy ball for hours. I made him a friendship bracelet. We colored. He jumped into my arms on the count of "uno, dos, tres!" so I could carry him around. Although we couldn't speak each other's language, we quickly learned to communicate via motions and facial expressions, and of course hugs.
Today when we arrived at the camp, I looked to my left and saw Zolee's face pressed up against my cab window with a huge grin on his face. He stuck his head through the driver's window and said "Mama!". I suppose the emotion really hit me as it approached time to leave today. I saw an older kid hitting and kicking Zolee extremely hard and I'm pretty sure I felt for a second what it's like to be a mom. I rushed over to pull him away and held him on my lap as he cried, and while we sat there, it took everything I had not to burst into tears. I just kept thinking – what if this happens to him frequently? There is no one who will do anything about it. These kids have no mothers or fathers to protect them and to comfort them in times of trouble. It just really killed me to think about how alone they are.
The bleakness of their futures is hard to overcome. At the age of 16, they must leave the orphanage, and they often have nowhere to go. It is difficult to get a job without an education, and it is impossible to get an education without money. I apologize for the discouraging nature of this blog – it's just what is on my heart right now.
Amidst all that depressing talk, I remind myself that God is still in control. He still has a plan. There is still a purpose for each of those children, no matter what they're going through right now. I am so grateful for Christian organizations who go into these orphanages regularly to share Jesus with the children. He is the light in the darkness. He is their only hope. He is the only hope any of us have.
Psalm 68:4-6
"Sing to God, sing in praise of his name, extol him who rides on the clouds; rejoice before him—his name is the Lord. A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling. God sets the lonely in families, he leads out the prisoners with singing; but the rebellious live in a sun-scorched land."
John 14:18-19
"I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you. Before long, the world will not see me anymore, but you will see me. Because I live, you also will live."
