It was my last night to spend time with the street kids. Not something I did very often this month. After the first time I went I never felt like going again because I was just so overwhelmed. Buuuut I am so grateful I went tonight. I was able to hang out with the prostitutes and hold one woman's baby. I let a little girl fall asleep with her head in my lap. I let four year old little Christina take pictures with my camera and saw her face light up with excitement after each one she took. I ran around with kids on my shoulders and hanging from my arms. I watched. I sat on the curb holding Joshua and just watched the beautiful, happy children run around and laugh and giggle and scream because they were being chased in a game of tag.
AJ, one of the prostitutes, asked me why I was sad. I told her I wasn't sad at all. I think that was true. I mean I wasn't sad, I don't know what I was. I was holding a six month old, youngest of four, son of a prostitute named Joshua. I was just looking at him sleeping in my arms and praying for him and at that same time I just became so overwhelmed with love for him and his mother. For once I wasn't thinking about what would happen to them after this night. I wasn't thinking about their hard circumstances or how they ended up here. I usually become full of sorrow, grief, or indifference in those types of situations. But this time it was different. I felt nothing but love. I saw them how I think they deserve to be seen, as ordinary people doing what they can to get by. I saw through eyes of grace, I didn't feel angry towards the prostitute mothers. I saw through eyes of joy. Even though there were some hard sights to see I let myself be joyful because that's what the people on the street need, that's what kindles any flames of hope they may have. They don't need pity or sorrow reminding them of the sucky situation they are in. So anyways it was nice to see things a little differently for a change.
There's something stirring in me and I'm not exactly sure what it is. Maybe God is beginning to prepare my heart and the way I see things for next month, considering it will be devoted to building relationships and ministering to prostitutes. Good thing it’s starting now, two days before I leave, so I’m not completely paralyzed with grief when I am face to face with people stuck in the sex trafficking industry.
Up next is about a week long debrief with the squad in Bangkok, Thailand then we will be splitting into separate ministries for the next three weeks. The men will be off doing lots of manly things. And the women will be dispersed in their teams to different locations. I will be with my team and two other teams in Phuket working with SHE ministries (http://shethailand.org).
Please pray for us, I think this will be a spiritually and emotionally intense month for all of us.
Praise God for He is GOOD!
