The sun is shining, periodically concealing itself behind puffy, white clouds amongst a vibrant sky with patches of gray and dark blue. The trees in the park I am sitting in have a nearly lime green hue, casting shade amongst the fountains and tiled seats. After a weekend of pure exhaustion, finally a moment of pure rest.
For exactly one week, I have been in Mendoza, Argentina. To provide general updates of what this month has looked like so far, I will share where we are working and what we are doing in this city I have come to thoroughly enjoy. Although I am currently in an urban, bustling area of the city, my squad mates and I live in an area of Mendoza that is more rural, as we are partnering with YWAM this month (Youth With a Mission).
It is all squad month, which means that all fifty of us — regardless of team — are all living at the YWAM base here in Mendoza doing ministry together. The base has been extremely comfortable. When we first arrived, in utter honesty, I was hit with the realization that I am on the race. De-boarding the bus, it was hot, humid, and there were mosquitos everywhere buzzing around us almost instantaneously. As I stumbled to the room where we would meet our new hosts, I noticed all of the giant ants crawling on the ground. “Woah. This is not like Calama,” I thought to myself. How I misjudged my new home. Although, yes, living is not as glamorous as it had been in Calama, the base has comfortable accommodations, meals that are cooked and provided to us, and overwhelmingly hospitable and accepting hosts who are eager to know us. The morning after arriving, I was confronted with the truth of this year’s intention. Although the base is leaps and bounds more comfortable than I had expected, I was suddenly reminded of the truth that even if it had not been, my ridiculous display of irritation was wholly contradictory to the nature of this year. I did not sign up to be comfortable or completely cared for. Praise the Lord for this revelation that I will undoubtedly need to be reminded of this whole year.
I nearly immediately recognized my misjudgment the next morning, as the staff of YWAM led a presentation on Argentinian culture, allowing us to both taste and see a glimpse into their country. They performed an Argentine tango as well as allowed us to taste tortas fritas (essentially fried bread with sugar) and mate (an extremely popular herbal tea that is sipped with a straw in a very specific cup…mate is my new passion).
Despite the fact that it is all squad month, we still work individually in our teams. This week, my team worked on base, helping sand and paint a cabin. The base sits on some acreage (although I am unsure of the exact number) and is heavily shaded with trees that are now accessorized by the variety of colorful enos my squad and I have littered across their trunks. The first week of ministry was rewarding, as manual labor yields an entirely unique feeling. Unlike the past month, working on a building lends itself a drastically more visual representation of the work we do, which has been rewarding in its own rite. The panda rangers are now certified expert sanders and painters and ladder-climbers — despite my newfound fear of heights discovered whilst participating in a ropes course on the first day at YWAM — and we enjoyed spending time together while listening to an assortment of tunes, whether La La Land, Hamilton, Taylor Swift, or jazz. We began forming relationships with both Richard and Johnny, the YWAMers who were assisting and directing us. Although ministry will change depending on where the staff needs the various teams week to week, I am incredibly encouraged by the first week spent in Mendoza. In addition to ministry, each team has the expectation to work in the kitchen one day a week.
Thus was ministry up until this weekend. This weekend, however, was a completely different type of challenging.
DISCLAIMER
Because my squad mates might participate in the same or similar activities my team and I did this past weekend, and the whole weekend operates under the element of the unknown, I cannot give many details of the specific activities.
However, I will say that this weekend demanded ultimate reliance on God. I realized the cognitive dissonance that exists between my declaration of God’s goodness even in the discomfort, and the reality of my state of being when placed in such instances. This past weekend, I was pushed not only in the physical but also the spiritual. Within the unknown of what challenges lay ahead, I was struck with my reliance on prediction. I rely on my ability to know what is coming and form a plan of attack. This strips away the concept of full reliance on God, as I depend on my own logic and ideas to solve problems rather than the One whose knowledge and ability surpasses my own by legions. Between the multitude of conversations with strangers this weekend, the humbling experience of washing dishes in exchange for pizza, and the miles of walking through the city in the midst of various challenges, I found encouragement through the strengthening of relationships. I found growth in my relationship with my teammates, my relationship with the two YWAMers (Gama and Vanessa) who led us through the weekend, and growth in my relationship with the Lord. Since debrief — a time the whole squad spent together to discuss the events of the first month — I have been faced with questions in my relationship with God that I have not yet faced. I have been striving to examine what dark places of my life I am hiding from the Lord and what things I am refusing to fully surrender. In addition, living in community with Christians who experience God in various ways, I am grappling with the notion of faith versus feeling, the unique ways Jesus speaks to us, as well as the reality that He does not speak to us all in comparable ways. As I continue to work through insecurities in my own walk, I will write a more extended blog on these thoughts that are currently much too scattered to convey.
Nevertheless, to end on a confident note, this weekend, in all its uncertainty and unpredictability, I renounced my right to just that. I renounced my right to guess the future and plan for what I predict. If Jesus renounced every possible right He had when He came to earth, I can surely work on renouncing this small right.
