Well, I am back from training…early! Why, you might ask? That’s a very good question. I was so excited to get to training and to meet all the people I’d be living in community with for a year around the world! The moment I got there, the people were amazing, but something was just wrong. I felt like I had hit a brick wall and everyone else went right through it. I was stripped of the desire that I had to go on the World Race. I was very broken about that and saught the Lord morning and night, more like weeping and sobbing and begging to have the passion back to do this. My stomach was in constant knots, so bad at points that I just had to bend down to lessen the pain. I talked with an amazing lady at the camp and she encouraged me to walk in peace and just accept whatever the Lord would tell me. She prayed with me and asked the Lord for His peace. He answered.
He showed me and a few other people, that He has something else for me–not the World Race. One night, the camp leader asked all of us to turn to one another and describe a dream you have of expecting God to do something big, most people said things like “what if whole nations could come to Jesus!?” or “what if God would give us the prostitutes in Bangkok??” and all I could think of was the hurting young women here in America. I stopped, I couldn’t talk. I couldn’t say it. I was supposed to go around the world…so why was I thinking about the American women with eating disorders, with self-injury issues, sexual abuse history, etc.? After quite a few other instances similar to this, and one instance involving my mom speaking confirmation to me…I realized the World Race isn’t what God has for me. I say a tearful thank you to all of you who have supported me prayerfully so faithfully and have encouraged me in your words and have supported me financially.
Those who have supported me financially, I am so very sorry about this but your gifts to the World Race fund are nonrefundable. They will be going to things such as: helping other World Racers spread the love of Jesus, helping World Racers give shoes to orphans, or whatever else God might want to do with your money. So it was not spent in vain.
I love you guys all so much and I hope that you will understand what God is doing. I don’t fully understand it, but I recognize the call of my God. I’d love to talk with you guys about this one-on-one, so if you want to email me back and chat about it, please do..or you can call me or we can meet up or something. Thank you again for your amazing support. I love you all.
January World Racers—I miss you guys!! If any of you ever just need a word of encouragement or want to vent or talk anything through, please don’t hesitate to email me or skype me! And if any of you are ever in Nashville–we have to get together!! You guys are amazing. I’m so proud of all of you. If Gretchen is right, I should be getting red by now because of my emotions. haha. God bless you guys!
