First of all I have to say God is amazing! I am not the same person I was a year ago. A year ago I was starting to live a “normal’ life. I was starting to look for a home, I had a nice car, great family and friends, an awesome church, oh and my soul dog Duncan Aka “Boo Boo”(anyone that has had a pet like this understands that bond). 
In May the house I really liked got another offer and the deal fell through. I prophesied for the first time that I remember that day. I said well thats ok maybe God wants me to go into a long term mission. I scoffed at that idea because why would I want to give up the life I had. June, came and I started to fall into a deep depression (I can’t remember how long I had been depressed it was just getting worse) I wasn’t in the Word and just started believing some of the lies the Devil is ready to tell you. I think I also liked to wallow in my self pitty cause that just seemed easier as the Devil had me to believe. In July I lost my buddy Boo Boo. I was devastated. I started to put on a front. I isolated myself from others, I didn’t want people know I was broken. I wanted to be the strong one people came to. In August, I cried out to God. Is this All? Am I just going to settle into this “normal”? Now, I don’t believe there is anything wrong with this “normal” but my heart was just crying out for something different. What is wrong with me? I am a believer I am not supposed to feel like this. I know I have a passion to help the hurting, heal the sick, and walk in your love, peace and joy so how do I get from here to there? When you ask God to reveal things be ready because He will show you. In this He showed me grace first because He knew I knew why I was seperated from Him and that was sin and not being in the Word. So sometime in August God called me to the World Race. September, I was accepted. October, I was thinking what the heck did I get myself into. November, I got excited. December, I started planning. January, God strengthed friendships of Amazing women of God. These woman have been an incredible support and fundamental in my fundraising. God is so strategic! February, I prayed to be freed from all the garbage and lies I had believed. March, I was freed from those lies and continue to walk in the true purpose God has for my life. This past year the Devil tried to snatch me from my purpose but God had already devised an escape route. All I can say is BUT GOD! I had to make the choice to cry out and as soon as I humbled myself things started to change. There is so much more growth and glory in each of these past months but all I can say is I am not where I was. God gave me a revelation last week. He said I know your earthly father wasn’t there for you but I have been there and I am a better father than any. Glory to God. So then I realized that Jesus is my brother. (sometimes things are obvious but it’s cool when you realize them) God loved me so much that he chose to send my brother as a sacrafice for me. WHAT?! I am sorry Lord you had to make that choice but I thank you Jesus that you were obediant to our father so that I would not be stuck in the pit I was in and the pain I was feeling. I am alive because He is alive to proclaim the works of the Lord! Man thats what happened last year wait to see what happens this year!
In May the house I really liked got another offer and the deal fell through. I prophesied for the first time that I remember that day. I said well thats ok maybe God wants me to go into a long term mission. I scoffed at that idea because why would I want to give up the life I had. June, came and I started to fall into a deep depression (I can’t remember how long I had been depressed it was just getting worse) I wasn’t in the Word and just started believing some of the lies the Devil is ready to tell you. I think I also liked to wallow in my self pitty cause that just seemed easier as the Devil had me to believe. In July I lost my buddy Boo Boo. I was devastated. I started to put on a front. I isolated myself from others, I didn’t want people know I was broken. I wanted to be the strong one people came to. In August, I cried out to God. Is this All? Am I just going to settle into this “normal”? Now, I don’t believe there is anything wrong with this “normal” but my heart was just crying out for something different. What is wrong with me? I am a believer I am not supposed to feel like this. I know I have a passion to help the hurting, heal the sick, and walk in your love, peace and joy so how do I get from here to there? When you ask God to reveal things be ready because He will show you. In this He showed me grace first because He knew I knew why I was seperated from Him and that was sin and not being in the Word. So sometime in August God called me to the World Race. September, I was accepted. October, I was thinking what the heck did I get myself into. November, I got excited. December, I started planning. January, God strengthed friendships of Amazing women of God. These woman have been an incredible support and fundamental in my fundraising. God is so strategic! February, I prayed to be freed from all the garbage and lies I had believed. March, I was freed from those lies and continue to walk in the true purpose God has for my life. This past year the Devil tried to snatch me from my purpose but God had already devised an escape route. All I can say is BUT GOD! I had to make the choice to cry out and as soon as I humbled myself things started to change. There is so much more growth and glory in each of these past months but all I can say is I am not where I was. God gave me a revelation last week. He said I know your earthly father wasn’t there for you but I have been there and I am a better father than any. Glory to God. So then I realized that Jesus is my brother. (sometimes things are obvious but it’s cool when you realize them) God loved me so much that he chose to send my brother as a sacrafice for me. WHAT?! I am sorry Lord you had to make that choice but I thank you Jesus that you were obediant to our father so that I would not be stuck in the pit I was in and the pain I was feeling. I am alive because He is alive to proclaim the works of the Lord! Man thats what happened last year wait to see what happens this year!In my trouble I cried to the Lord, And He answered me. Deliver my soul, O Lord, from lying lips, from a deceitful tongue.
Psalm 120;1-2
