These are excerpts from my journal. Prayers. Meditations. Struggles. Truths. This is raw and vulnerable and my hope is that you’ll understand my heart a little more after reading this. God did so much during my time at Training Camp. I’m not sure what I was expecting coming into training camp. I didn’t read all the blogs or watch all the vlogs so I came in pretty blind. There were so many unknowns but I knew I wanted to go in with an open mind and an open heart to allow the Lord to make moves.
My prayer the night before getting to TC was this:
Lord, give me a willing and bold spirit. Give me a heart of abandonment and allow me to let go of earthly possessions and relationships. Allow me to not get overwhelmed but to process things quickly and efficiently. Thank you for your presence in ALL things.
My prayer night one:
Lord I want to be known & I want to know you. Lord I want to create the space you need to take me on a journey. Lord I want to abandon my possessions, relationships and anything else that is a distraction. Lord I want to live a life where YOU are in control. Lord I want you to make moves in my life RIGHT NOW. Lord I need you. Fill me.
In what area has God been teaching and testing you?
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Trusting in God’s character and faithfulness in things I can’t understand
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Understanding that inviting the Holy Spirit in should lead to a transformed life and should overflow in everything I do.
How should you continue the teaching process?
Prayer. Obedience. Filling myself with scripture. It seems simple because it is. Creating the space to hear the Spirit and listening to what He’s telling me to do.
We are made in Christ’s image–you have a piece of Jesus in you that nobody else has. If you want to know more of Jesus get to know the people around you.
Practicing intimacy leads to trust and feeling known, fully. We did a meditation practicing asking and listening, this was my experience:
In the meditation we did, I pictured myself in a never ending field of lavender. Just rows and rows of it. In the distance I saw a man walking towards me. As he got closer I realized it was Jesus. I ran to Him. I held his hands. I asked him, “Am I who you want me to be? Am I on the right path? What do you want me to do next?” He looked at me with the kind eyes of a Father who knows his child and said “you are exactly who I made you to be. Don’t you think I will continue to lead you down the right path? Keep trusting me and walking with me and leave the rest to me. You are my daughter”
I feel an overwhelming sense of thankfulness. I’m so incredibly thankful for my experience at Training Camp. It felt amazing to begin developing habits that encourage intimacy with God and with my community. I’m also more excited than ever to begin this journey. Prayers for myself and my squadmates as we continue preparing emotionally, spiritually, and physically for the World Race would be so appreciated. Knowing I have this community of incredible supporters keeping up with my blog keeps ME encouraged so THANK YOU. I love you all.
