I think the biggest lesson I’ve learned on the Race is that God is Good. While many of you may be inserting “Duh” here, honestly take a minute and check to see if you actually believe that. Do you believe that all the time? Even when life sucks? Because it doesn’t always feel like He is.
If you had given me a plane ticket earlier this week, I would be back in Wisconsin enjoying cheese curds and Spotted Cow right now. Life sucked. I felt alone, forgotten, and exhausted. And this isn’t the first time on the Race I’ve been there.
I felt stuck in a dark pit of sinfulness with no way out. I could see the error in my way, and wanted to be different, except had no idea how to be different. And God was good through that. He used that situation, as He has countless times throughout the Race, to teach me and mold me and bless me. He used that situation to show me His unending goodness.
I had to cling to the truth of His goodness, because otherwise there was no point to going on. There was no point to continuing to press forwards through the darkness in my life, and there was no point to be here in Guatemala. Because if we don’t believe that God is good, then what is the point of our faith as a whole? We have to rest in his unfailing goodness to get us through the mountaintops and the valleys, to work all things for our good.
He also gave me words to remind me of His goodness when I forget. When all I see is the darkness in me, He is the flicker of light.
And so, without further ado, here is my debut as a poet.
There is nothing good in me.
Day after day I sit, waiting for change
And day after day the sun rises and sets
Constant and unchanging as the passage of time.
The darkness continues to creep, seeking to consume
And day after day I sit, waiting for change
For there is nothing good in me.
But there is only good in you.
Day after day you watch, waiting for me to return
And day after day the sun rises and sets
Constant and unchanging as the love you have for me.
The light continues to return, seeking to cast out the darkness forever
And day after day you call, waiting for me to return
For there is only good in you.
