Disclaimer: This blog is just a cool story. But it’s real.
It was 3:30 in the morning. I was sleeping in a tent in the middle of an African safari, miles away from most anything. We’re talking dirt roads, off-roading, are-we-sure-that-this-isn’t-quick-sand miles away from most anything.
And then I hear a knock on my tent. Not that you can really knock on a tent. But you get the idea. One of the guys I was with says “Can you hear the lions roaring? Also, do any of you have Pepto-Bismol? I’ve been throwing up all night.” Sadly, neither me nor my tent-mate had any Pepto, but I was suddenly hyperaware of every sound.
Earlier the day before we had found a zebra carcass that lions had devoured quite recently located quite near to where we were tenting. Which was freaking awesome. But our guide assured us that the lions had left the area and moved on. But I now had some solid evidence that he was wrong, and not only that, but I could hear that the roars were getting closer and closer.
Since I was now awake, there was no way I was going back to sleep. I was hardcore freaking out. I started shaking really bad, and the girl I was sharing a tent with was like “Are you okay?” And I was like “Yea. I’m just cold.” Ha. Not. She didn’t buy the lie either, and a few minutes later, and a few roars later, I go “Do you want to go sit on the porch?” because our guide was staying in a little hut run by place we were staying.
So she humors me, and gets out and sits on the porch. As my convulsing continues, we sit there and make some small talk as I pretend that the roars aren’t getting closer and closer. After a while, I tell the girl that she can go back to the tent, but I’m just going to stay on the porch. And since she’s so nice, she offers to ask our guide if we’re safe sleeping in our tents. And I’m like “Yep. Please do.” So she goes and asks, and our guide goes “Well how close are they?” And she goes “Pretty close”. And so our guide goes “Well, jump in the truck!” And I go “What?!?!” And he goes “Yep.” And so the other girl and I go and hop in our safari truck.
In the meantime, the other guys we are with start to wake up and hear us moving around. They ask us what’s going on, and we both go “We’re going LION HUNTING!” And so they jump out of their tents in different states of disarray, and hop up into the truck. As I’m still convulsing because I’m scared of getting attacked by a lion, I sit in the middle and make people sit on either side of me so that if a lion attacks it will get them instead of me. Sorry not sorry.
And so we drive off into the early morning. And listen for the roars. And so we drive to where our guide thinks that they are, and he tells us that it’s probably two brother lions who are staking their territory. And then he cuts the engine and turns off the lights. And we just sit there. In the dark. Waiting for lions. WHAT?!?!? It’s safe to assume that I continue freaking out. Because I did.
And then we start to hear the night noises. Like hyenas. And jackals. And hippos. And lions. But we’re sitting in the dark. And can’t actually see anything. Yay!
Since we don’t find the lions there, we drive around a little while, and find the lion tracks. Which lead us right back to our campsite. Which makes me real happy that we weren’t there.
So basically, the moral of the story is that I got really scared, but ended up getting a really cool experience out of it after the fact.
