PVT
“I know you changed and I could see it in you before you left home. From the time you were 16 and you went on a mission trip to Anchorage, I knew something in you was different. You never stopped going after what God had for you. Even when you messed up, you always knew where you needed to be. You follow Jesus at all costs, and I can look at you and know that if Jesus isn’t in it, you don’t want it. I am so Godly proud of you, and I want to be more like you. I know the Lord has called you higher than he has ever called me, and I know he has and will continue to take you further than I have ever been. That has always been my desire as a mother, and I’ve been so blessed to see it as it’s happening. You are my best friend, and I’m thankful that we get to share in this experience together. I know I won’t know exactly what it was like for you to come on this trip and the things you experienced, but I want to try and understand, so I can meet you there in love. But I want you to share it with me Alisha. I want that because I love you.”
These are the words my mom spoke to me as I sat in a plastic chair on a dusty rooftop in India. I was blown away that every prayer I had prayed, and every question I had was answered within a matter of minutes. I wanted my mom and I to move past this place of mother daughter; and into friendship, sisters in Christ, and daughters of the King who lift each other up. I wanted her to see Jesus in me, just like I had in her all my life. I loved that as she lifted me up in truth she also reminded me that this experience of the race isn’t just for me. It’s meant to be shared with the body of Christ. It was never supposed to be something that I held onto so tightly in my own hands, saying all these amazing things about it, but never letting anyone get close enough to touch it; or better yet, to experience it through the Holy Spirit. I absolutely loved that in such a special moment I could feel the presence, and hear the truth of the Holy Spirit through my mom.
The Holy Spirit needs to, and wants to be shared with everyone. My mom reminded me of this by reminding me that God has taken me on this amazing journey to all these other places to partner with Him in what he’s doing across the globe, but not to get arrogant about my experiences. I’m so quick to get snappy when someone tries to relate to an experience I’ve had. Instead of inviting them into it through a similar instance in both our lives, I was trying to hold it to myself so that no one else could touch it. What the Spirit told me is that,
“It doesn’t become any less special by relating it to something others can understand. My power doesn’t become less. You’re helping me to create a bridge for someone to get to me by means of a shared story. And that is something beautiful.”
I don’t think I would’ve so tangibly learned that lesson without my mom being willing to speak that to me.
I deeply enjoyed that week with my mom, and being able to spend one on one time with her. I was able to see her function in her strengths that God gave her, and see how so much of her, is in me. It was amazing to see how free she was, being exactly who God created her to be. I’m so blessed to be of a generation that came from Michelle Hale-Allen and I know God ordained this long ago and that is so encouraging to think of. Love you mom, and thanks for being so obedient to the Lord and doing all that he has asked of you day in, and day out even before I was born. I can’t express how proud I am of you, and your own walk with the Lord, and I’m so thankful that I’m like you in so many ways.
Love,
Alisha