Socially awkward: an individual excessively afraid of social interaction due to some form of peer rejection or personal choice. Presenting a form or different forms of uncomfortability when around others.
Or, in other words:ALISA
I know this may come as a surprise to you, but it is the truth; I am just REALLY good at hiding it.
You know those kids who wore BIG glasses and hand-me-down clothing, barely spoke, stared at each and every passer-by, and sat alone…well, that was me. I was the loner that the other kids on the playground made fun of. I was the child who would hang out with my teacher at lunch time instead of making conversation with my peers-over my dead body would I EVER dare to open my mouth. I am going to be honest, the one stronghold I have had my entire existence is fear-I was fear for MOST of my life.
I was deathly afraid that if I were to speak out loud, that people would think I was stupid-I feared rejection which ultimately made me a reject; that became my identity.
As I grew older and experienced more of life, I started to put on every face but my own. I had a facade for each person I had a relationship with and built up walls so that I would NEVER be rejected. I would only let people stand at an arm’s length and put them through tests that would prove that they deserved my trust. I hurt a lot of people in this process-especially myself.
The moment I came to Christ, I started the search of, “Who am I?” I found in scripture that my identity is in Christ and I started the declaration period of my life. Every morning I would stand in front of the mirror and declare the words that expressed who I really was.
I began to walk in my new identity and was given a new name by our Savior-I was set, or so I thought…
To be continued…
