During the race once a week we do a session called “Journey Markers.”
Journey Markers are devotionals that follow the “journey” of us racers as disicples.
We read scripture, and then have a series of questions to think about, and give to the Lord to help us find answers. Since I’ve been on the field for two weeks now, I’ve done two journey markers. The first one asked us questions along the lines of goals for the race, why God is calling us to the race, etc.
BUT this week’s questions really resonated with me.
As odd as it sounds it definitely took a day of sitting in a dorm room during a hurricane to make me realize something really important- the answer to one of the journey marker questions asked later that night.
The question was:
“When life gets uncomfortable, what things do you turn to, to numb the pain?”
Whenever I’m in pain, or feeling down, or just having a day where “I’m not myself,” I do the same things. Things that I don’t think I’ve ever realized I have done. I sleep a lot (a lot as in a 7 hour nap), and I completely isolate myself. I don’t want to talk through my feelings, be touched, or just spend quality time with someone.
Yesterday when I was basically cooped up in my shared dorm room with about 17 other girls, I took not one, but TWO naps, totaling in 7 hours. Honestly, I thought it would help me forget about that hug I’ve been really craving to get from my mom, or the puppy licks from my dog, or the comfortableness from my community at home. Trust when I say, I woke up and felt no different than when I started napping.
After my naps, and dinner, journey markers happened. That’s where I was asked that question. In that moment I realized what I had done that day, or more so what I’ve been doing for years. And in that moment that was God telling me that it is okay to be uncomfortable, but it is not okay to “numb” the pain in unhealthy ways.
Now as odd as it sounds this blog is not suppose to be bringing myself down, or talking about me feeling down, or craving the comfortability of home, but it’s about celebration. I get to celebrate the fact that I have leaders here to ask the hard questions, I have a God who provides me with uncomfortable situations so I can grow and learn from them, AND IF THAT’S NOT SOMETHING TO CELEBRATE ABOUT THEN I DON’T KNOW WHAT IS.
So now I’ll leave you with a short little message, no matter how uncomfortable you are in a situation you can always… “Celebrate GOD times.”
