As the readers of my previous blogs know, my mom died when I was 14. I was a freshman in high school, preparing to go to my first homecoming dance. It was November 2nd. Today is the 6th. High emotions and travel days prevented me from writing this until now, but it’s better late than never. I’m striving to make Jesus and my mom proud every day.
On the 3rd, I felt an internal nudge to listen to a podcast by Breakaway Ministries, titled “From Death to Life”. I didn’t think much of it- I had it downloaded on my phone for ages and was just getting around to listening to it. Matt Chandler started off my talking about death (how apropos), by giving quite an interesting quote. He began, “The thought is overwhelming, that soon this body of mine must be a carnival for worms.” Ew. I’d rather not think about decomposing bodies, especially after reliving the worst day of my life. Thanks a lot, Jesus.
He continued by telling a personal story of dealing with a recently deceased person. That the man he dealt with, was no less dead that someone who has already decomposed. Matt continued by giving scriptural accounts of the 3 people recorded that Jesus rose from the dead. That little 12 year old girl who just barely passed, a man who had died the day before, and Lazarus, who had beens solidly dead for 3 days. Yet- they were all dead. Lazarus wasn’t more dead than that little girl- they were both as dead as dead gets.
Then Matt starts talking about Ephesians 2. If you haven’t read it- it’s worth a read. If you have, it’s worth a revisit with this new outlook. Verse 4-5 say “But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together in Christ-“. We were DEAD in our trespasses. Dead in every trespass. Not less dead than our neighbor because “at least we didn’t do that“. This comparison of sin and levels of sin is almost comical, because sin is sin. Dead is dead. Our sin made us dead. And dead we would stay.
Well great. I love thinking about my mom, whom I miss tremendously, then listening to a podcast about death, and about how permanent it is. Why would Jesus ask me to listen to this?
Because if I only keep reading, if I only let Jesus finish His sentence and His promise, I can realize that, in Christ, there’s more to death than I thought. More than I could possibly wish for. The rest of that same scripture finishes like this- “by grace you have been saved- and raised up with Him and seated with Him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages He might show the immeasurable riches of His grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus.”
So really, I didn’t listen to a podcast about death, but about life. The reality is I was dead, but Christ died the death I deserved so that I could have the eternal life He is entitled to. I listened to a podcast about hope, about new beginnings.
Not just hope for myself either. As if it isn’t enough that Christ died so that I could live again, that I get to spend eternity with my Savior who freely gave His life for mine, but that others get that same gift. Others- meaning my mom. Christ died so that we could be born again, so that I could live with Him in Heaven, and my mom as well. Someday I’ll get to worship God alongside my mom, in perfect health and harmony. No longer dead, no longer lonely, but very much alive and well.
Now that’s a promise I’m excited to see fulfilled.
