Today God has been teaching me a lot about obedience and what it means to be obedient in all aspects of my life. I’ve learned really quickly that I’m obedient in the big stuff, like when I said “yes” to be homeschooled halfway through my junior year of high school, when I said “yes” to not applying to my dream college and not go to college at all, and like right now, when I’m saying “yes” to this journey called The World Race. But, I’m horrible at being obedient in the small things.
When its big things, big decisions that shape our future and shake up our life, its easy (for me anyway) to lean on God, who knows where I’m going before I do and knows whats best for me. But in the small acts of obedience its so easy for me to tune Gods voice out, to make the decision quickly on my own and run with it. None of this hit me until this afternoon when I was waiting in the school pick up line for Alex (the little 5 year old I babysit). Everyday there is a Citizen Patrolman directing the traffic at the entrance of the school, so things move smoothly when everyone is trying to leave. Well today a new man, its usually the same two guys alternating, was there standing in the middle of the street when I pulled in. I had been praying for God to give me an opportunity to give someone the little cards that my church gives us to invite people to holiday services, I.g. Easter. I immediately knew it was someone here at the school,
“A teacher?”
“No Alexus.”
“The car in front of me?”
“No Alexus.”
“Okay…the car behind then?”
“Nope.”
And then I looked at the patrolman and anxiety immediately set in my stomach. Listen y’all, if you’re all cool, calm, and collected and then you ask God what to do, you know you’ve got your answer when you hear it and then right away Satan starts discouraging you or making you feel anxious. He doesn’t want us to be a light! So after about 10 minutes of twiddling my thumbs and procrastinating, the school bell rang to release the kids,
“When are you going to obey me, Alexus?”
“…You know thats a good question God, really.” Still procrastinating..
“Why don’t you obey me and listen to me in the small tasks such as these?”
And thats when I realized how many times I’ve said “No.” How many times I listened to my anxiety and fears more than I’ve been obedient to God. How many opportunities had I missed to plant seeds? To water them?
So I slowly opened my door, silently praying that the line doesn’t start moving while I’m not in my car, and walk out into the street where the man is, I say “Hi, God is telling me to give this to you, so if you don’t have a church family to spend Easter with here is an invitation with all the information you might need.” He said “Thank you” with a big smile and that was that. Nothing miraculous, no revival happening in the middle of a two lane road, and thats when I realized that it was for me. That I needed to give that man the card so I can learn all of this that I’ve written. I couldn’t help but giggle when I got back in the car at how simple it all was but how complicated I made it, I’m good at that. We are all good at that. If we just say “Yes God” he will carry us the rest of the way, whether its in the big moments or the small ones that to us seem so not important. By saying “No” to the small acts of witnessing that God asks us to do, we’re saying that he’s only powerful in the big things, that He isn’t doing a good & new thing in the mundane. God is ALWAYS doing new things in the hearts of His people, just because we can’t see it doesn’t mean their isn’t growth and redemption happening.
“You are my friends if you do what I command.” John 15:14 (so simple and so beautiful!)
“See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.” Isaiah 43:19
**Okay, a little fundraising update; T-Shirt sale is now closed, thank you to everyone who bought a shirt! I’m now doing a mothers day raffle, which is super exciting and I think it’ll be really successful. As of right now I’m 20% funded, which is great! My first deadline is in June for $5,000 and my second is in August for $10,000. I’m so blessed to have every bit of support, financially and prayerfully, God is doing some really awesome things already and I can’t wait to see where He takes me in the next year.
