I can remember about a year ago this time sitting in a coffee shop after touring Texas Christian University with my dad and sister. Jokingly, I turned to my dad and asked a question I thought would get a rousing response. I said, “Dad, what would you tell me if I said I didn’t want to go to college next year, but instead wanted to go to Africa to do mission work?” I thought for sure I would get an answer that went something like this: “you have worked too hard in high school for that. College is the only way to ensure success.” To my surprise, my dad answered in a comforting tone of, “I would support you the best I could.” While he gave me an awesome response, it didn’t matter to me at all because that was only a silly question I asked to see if I could make my dad mad, never in this world would I take a year off to go to Africa! That just isn’t me. No, no. I’m Alexis Dillon. Planning which sorority I want to be in and what dresses I would wear for Rush. College is what I had been looking forward to for so long! And I wanted to go somewhere down South where the boys were nice, but they dressed even nicer. That was my plan, it had always been my plan.
As colleges acceptances started rolling in, they didn’t seem to bring any peace with them. Texas Christian was the only place I could actually see myself going to, and the only place I was excited for, but my mom hated the idea of me going there. I felt so overwhelmed. We’re talking about my future for goodness sake! Choosing the wrong school could lead me into year of misery followed by even more years of impenetrable debt. I didn’t know where to go, I didn’t know who to run to. I would cry out to the Lord begging for guidance and a clear path, but He was giving me no answer… or so I thought.
I started thinking more and more about that running joke I had going for so long: I’m going to take a year off and live in Africa. But I continued to brush it aside, knowing it was far-fetched. With college decisions still weighing me down at every moment, I got a very encouraging call one day from my cousin who is very close to me. She gave me some advice about applying to places with rolling admissions, or possibly taking classes at our local community college. Then, she said something that kind of struck me- “Lex, have you ever thought about maybe taking a year off and doing extended mission work?” Stunned, I wanted to reply, “Well um yes, but I’ve been trying not to think about it.” Then, Sunday March 29th, I felt the Lord speak to me like I had never felt before. During the service (and I honestly have no idea what our Pastor was speaking on) I just felt a constant tug on my heart. I just felt God telling me to look into doing extended mission work over the next year, so I agreed. Right then and there, I agreed that I would consider looking into it and maybe talk to my youth pastor. Service ended and I moseyed on along to one of my good friend/mentor’s bridal shower. I had not seen this woman in MONTHS, nor had I even mentioned any of the college chaos that was going on in my life. We screamed and embraced as all distant friends do with the “ahh you look so good how are you doing”’s, but I quickly had to take back my answer to that question, because I was in fact not doing so well. That wonderful, Godly example in my life, looked me straight in the eyes and spoke these words: “Before you say anything. I don’t know what you’re going through and it may or may not have to deal with college next year but let me tell you that I’ve been there and God is going to guide your path.” Then without further hesitation she uttered those dreadful words from Jesus Christ himself: “have you ever thought about taking a gap year and doing mission work?”
…what. How does that even happen? She proceeded to tell me all about The World Race. I researched it immediately after and fell in love. I talked to both my parents and they were completely supportive. I prayed and prayed and for the first time felt a peace in my heart about my future.
But… I forgot about one thing. It’s me we’re talking about here, God. Alexis Dillon. My talents include noticing someone’s name brand handbag and being at my friends’ beckoning calls to do their hair and makeup. It’s just not my personality to do something like this. I don’t even like nature. But I can tell you, God shook my world. He said to me Alexis, I know you. I MADE you. I know what you are capable of. Your strength comes from me alone, and because I have called you, I will equip you. God uses us when we think we are weak. That is how He gets His glory! If He called us when we were strong, we wouldn’t have to rely on His power. We would have no need to trust Him. Yes, I am one freakishly girly human being. Yes, I have the biggest fear of spiders and I’ve never pitched a tent in my life. But yes, I have a God on my side who is far greater than I will ever be, and He has given me this task and I must obey. Through prayer and further self-evaluation, the Lord has shown me many more gifts I am blessed with that reassure my decision to go on this trip. Every day I become more excited about how God is going to use and CHANGE me over the span on nine short months. So though this question of are you sure you are talking to me God? Alexis Dillon? still approaches my thoughts, I am comforted with one fact I know to be true: Alexis Dillon doesn’t find her identity in the world, or in herself. Alexis Dillon finds her identity in the Lord Jesus Christ.
