Dear Jesus,
I knew it wasn’t going to be easy. Everyone said that it was going to be the most challenging year of my life. I just didn’t know it was going to be like this. Make me steadfast, O Lord.
My birthday is tomorrow and Christmas in two days. Being away from my family and friends during this time of the year is very difficult. I rest in Your grace when I miss them and long to be with them back home. You called me to the nations for 11 months. You called me for a specific purpose. You called me to love your people and serve You. Renew Your calling in me. Make me steadfast, O Lord.
Thank you for bringing me to Thailand this month. Thank you for the work You are doing through me at the daycare my team is working at. Thank you for the rich culture and beautiful landscape that this country has. But Jesus, this country is hard. Watching your people bow down and worship gold-painted statues made of stone and wood is heart breaking. Feeling the darkness in this country has worn me down. It is so hard. Remind me that I am Your light, and that Your light always defeats the darkness. The victory has already been secured. Death has no hold on this country. Please keep that hope burning in me. Make me steadfast, O Lord.
God, I am weary. Sometimes I doubt what difference I am even making. I let the enemy speak lies into me. Forgive me. I need You now. I am weak, and I need my Savior to sustain me. Breathe life and hope into me. Help me to need You more and more everyday. I know that when I feel like I can’t do another day, that You can in me. Thank you that I can’t do it on my own. It is Your work through me, so that I can’t boast of my own doing but in You alone. Help me to rest in that. Make me steadfast, O Lord.
You who started a good work in me will continue it till the day of completion. Create in me a strong spirit. Walk with me as I continue sharing Your life-changing love with the nations. Break me and fill me. Make me steadfast, O Lord, for Your glory above all.
Amen.
“Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kind, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.” James 1:2-4
P.S. Tomorrow is my big golden birthday! I turn 24 on the 24th of December! I still need to raise another $2,105 before March 1st, 2015 in order to stay on the World Race. If you can, please prayerfully consider donating $24 on the 24th for my 24th birthday. That would be so special to me. Thank you all for keeping up with my journey on the race and for supporting me! Have a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year 2015!!
