To sum up my month…
What in the world am I doing?!
It’s funny how true the saying, “Pride goes before a fall”
is… I’m not sure if I came on the race with a sense of pride, but after being
out here for a month and realizing how much I don’t know has been a humbling
blessing. I left the states “knowing so much about God’ only to have Him blow
the doors off of that idea. .. that sounds really vague… I’ll try to clarify.
We watched a movie I guess last week, and the opening scene
there is a girl riding on a merry-go-round. She said it was her favorite ride
because it was safe…you went round and round, never going anywhere. It was
safe… This month made me realize how safe I’ve been living as a Christian. It
has been my favorite thing, being a Christian… but I did the church thing,
going round and round, safe, but never really getting anywhere. I mean… God has
been moving me my whole life to get me to this place… but being here with these
people…Well God blew me away. At church, I was perfectly happy talking about
God and could talk for hours about it if the opportunity arose, but 
outside of
Church I only spoke of Him if asked. At church I put my church face on… a smile
would grace my face if I made eye contact with someone, but even then I barely
broke a grin. Church was a nice activity and I would have fun before and after
church, but it was during the service I would for some reason become very
solemn. During praise and worship I
stood there just reading the words out loud to the tune the band
played…sometimes meaning them, other times, honestly, just going through the
motions. I would give of my time and sometimes my money, but only if there was
some big something going on. And I was content to go about my day, keeping my
pearl of Salvation to myself, only letting the joy be seen by a few. But then
there was the pull to go on the World Race. I guess I thought I would witness
boldly in the streets and the Word would be spread. But upon arriving in
Panajachel, within a few days I realized just how little I knew…
Within our first week we got called out by a 17 year old
girl who has had the gift of prophecy manifested in her since the age of 4. She
asked us, “If you are in Christ, why do your faces not show it? It is a HAPPY
thing! He is here! He is God! Let your faces show it!” That was the first night
I began to feel freedom. The people here, when they are at church it is not
about what other people think. These services are all out services… I mean I’ve
been moved to dance hard core…and for those of you who know me, dancing is not
my thing, yet to walk in the freedom of the Spirit… man, how could I not dance?
I get to be a part of His Kingdom! I am not a slave to sin!!!! I am not a slave
to death! I have walked on a volcano and felt the searing heat of the lava. I have
stood on the tops of mountains and seen a glimpse of His vast glory. I have
seen storms that shake the ground… I have talked with people who have lived
such hard lives, yet in their faces you see only the joy of the Lord… They all
come from varied back-grounds, but as far as money goes they all have none or
very little. They don’t worry about how they sound or if they are clapping on
beat…they don’t care if they are dancing fast to a slow song… they are so
focused on where they are…for when they worship the long to be in His
presence…they ache to give Him all the praise they can, for they do not have
silver or gold to offer yet what they have they give freely to Him… Their faces
show the unmistakable mark of His Joy, grinning from ear to ear crying out praises
to Him, waving flags, dancing in the aisles… they serve the Living God… and
they can’t wait to tell people about Him.
not let the past dictate who you are in Christ, for in Him there is a Freedom
unlike anything this world can afford.
The woman we finished the house for stands out in my mind. The house we
finished is a simple small two story cinder-block house with a bathroom with no
door, a bedroom, and that’s really about it. They don’t really have much, but
the joy of the Lord radiates from her as she falls into Him, seeing Him provide
and meet all her needs. I find myself aching to move all the more as I
have been so richly blessed to worship beside a people such as those we have
found here in Panajachel.
Tonight was our last Sunday service
with the church… it was a humbling experience… these people who we came to
serve washed our feet… a gift I was shattered to receive. As they washed my
feet all I could think was, “Lord, please help me live a life worthy of this
calling…” These people who have nothing as far as worldly things go, were so
eager to serve us because as it was said tonight, our team is part of the
prophecy of the Lords return…”When the gospel has been preached to all people”…
they were thrilled to be a part of it, to send us out as though we were of
their own church family…
moved… I have a Joy that cannot be contained…I have Love and Hope to share with
the nations… I have been called to bring light into the darkness, not by my
might, but by His alone… This month I have learned what it is to worship the
Living God… and to be honest it does not look anything like the way I used to
worship… but I have learned and continue to learn what it is to worship in
Spirit and in Truth…I have learned what it is to give freely… I have grown up
with so much… but being here with all of these people I don’t desire money,
save what I can get to give away… They have reminded me that God provides for
His children, not one will go without…He will give all that we need, nothing
more, and nothing less… I can’t go back to where I was.. I have no desire to
stand before God and not be moved… No… I have been invited and called to
explore His Kingdom… I have His Spirit and ache and long to seek first His
Kingdom… to Love God… to Love others… Life as I knew it has dissipated and now
I dive head-long into the unknown seeking His Kingdom with all my heart,
sharing it with everyone I possible can…waiting with expectancy and wide-eyed
wonder at what my God will do next…
*photos done by Sydnee Mela(http://sydneemela.theworldrace.org)
