The thought of walking up to a bar, ordering a Coke and talking to women was a little awkward for me, not gonna lie. I mean, I love talking to people; random conversations are my favorite, but this is different. It’s like we’re undercover spies or stealth ninjas or something, having to keep our identities hidden. It’s a whole new ball game here in Thailand folks.
There is a strategy. We look for bars that have the least amount of people, the girls just standing around, waiting for the next customer to arrive. We are that customer. Sitting down they hand us a menu filled with every alcoholic beverage you could imagine. They make commission off of those drinks so when we order a soft drink, fruit juice or water it’s basically a no sell for them. The next move is crucial in starting conversations. You ask to play a game. That’s right…a game.
It’s our choice between Connect Four, Jackpot (a dice game), Jenga and the Nail Game (hammering a nail into wood with the skinny side of the hammer). My personal favorite is the Nail Game. Maybe because I’m awesome and win almost every other time, or maybe it’s because I get to hit something. I’ll leave that up for you to decide. Conversations do start out a little slow with, “what’s your name?”, “where are you from?”, “how long have you been working here?”, etc. After a few visits to these bars the relationships with the women grow stronger. Conversations go deeper. Trust starts to show with them sharing their lives with us.
Fran is extremely beautiful and so smart. Studying business in college but not having money to pay for it. Therefore, she’s in the bars. She’s not planning on being there much longer because she has a Japanese lover. They met at her work and have been in a relationship for the past 4 years. He pays her a monthly salary so she can live off of that and save the money she makes in the bar for school. Oh, did I mention the Japanese lover is married and has kids? Yikes! He comes to Thailand for “business” and whispers sweet nothings in Fran’s ear giving her hope of a future with him. Who knows what will happen with that situation but we constantly tell her how smart and beautiful she is hoping that one day she will realize it. She works at the bar that sells raffle tickets every night and the winner gets the girl. Please pray for her safety and that one day soon she will understand how much she’s really worth.There are countless other stories. Some of the women are there to pay off debt. Maybe their parents wanted a new motorbike, or needed rice for the next three months; so they are sent to work in the bars to make as much money as fast as possible. Some of the women believe they will end up finding true love. Who am I to say that won’t happen. I guess anything is possible. But really?
The majority of the women I’ve talked to do not enjoy it. They are caught up in the money and don’t think any other job could be sufficient enough. They leave parents, husbands, boyfriends, children and siblings to come to the south of Thailand and sell their bodies. Some of them for weeks or months but for others, years. One lady I spoke with has a 9 year old son but she hasn’t seen him since he was 4. That’s five years of her son’s life she will never get back. Is the money she’s making really worth that?
Karen is the picture of innocence. I can see it in her eyes. When I first met her she had only been working in the bars for 2 weeks. She says she’s 21 but I think she’s younger, just between us. Her English is not so good and having a full conversation is a struggle. There were back to back nights that I didn’t get to see her. One night she was “with a customer” and the other was her 1 night off she gets a month. When I finally saw her again she was dancing on the bar. We made eye contact from across the room and her face lit up. I walked over to say hello even though I know she’s not allowed to come down to talk. But she stopped, bent down and in her broken English said, “when I see you, make my heart happy.” That pretty much made my life. Please pray for her heart and protection over her body.Bar hopping for Jesus is hard. It’s spiritually, emotionally and physically draining. I love it and hate it at the same time. I love connecting with these women but I hate leaving them every night, knowing they will be there for hours longer. I thank God for the ministry here and know that what I’m doing is part of a bigger plan.
