First, I must admit that I showered only one time during the 10 days of camp. I showered after the two-mile walk, but it was such a hassle and I barely felt clean after that I didn’t bother to do it again until I got home. I didn’t smell nearly as bad as one might imagine, after living outside for 10 days, hiking 18 miles of the Appalachian Trail, and doing other daily physical activities. My deodorant really held in there (Degree for men, if you were wondering). There were various faces around my armpits at one time or another throughout camp, and never a complaint.
Nothing could have really prepared me for training camp. I knew to expect the physical aspect of our time in Gainesville; but not the great spiritual, emotional, and mental significance of it.
The most memorable and telling event happened the very first night. I had been incredibly excited for training camp: to meet my squad and my leaders, to get put on a team, to get a better idea of what the Race would really be. I was even excited for the 18-mile hike. Even with the slight initial awkwardness of being surrounded by people I didn’t know in an unfamiliar place (very much a first-day-of-school kind of feeling) I wasn’t deterred. So it surprised me when, during our first worship session, an immense sadness came over me as I sang praises to the Lord. It was sudden and inexplicable.
I realized since becoming a Christian, I’d only ever sang worship in groups of people I knew and loved and felt entirely comfortable with. Now, standing among roughly 300 people I didn’t know, I felt very alone. Before this moment, in the time leading up to training camp and eventually my Race, I had felt pretty confident in the fact that leaving my loved ones for 11 months wouldn’t be very hard for me. Of course I would miss them, I had thought to myself, but it won’t be that bad.
Now, standing in that room during worship, the importance of the people who had been in my life over the last several years was so utterly obvious to me. I had been through an incredibly difficult year, and I wouldn’t have made it through that time without my friends and family. I had been in desperate need and the Lord met those needs through the people in my life. I had been dependent on them. God showed me then, as He had brought those people into my life, so had He brought these new people, my squadmates, into my life, and I would need them and be dependent upon them just the same. I could not discount the importance of my previous relationships, and I would surely be remiss to do the same thing on the Race. It was critical I become open, honest, and vulnerable, that I share my life with these people. I had trusted Him before to take care of me and there was no reason not to trust Him again.
As this revelation came upon me, the Lord also brought to mind all my expectations of the Race: the travel, the work, the experiences. I was certain God would do incredible things through me on the Race. I was so eager to put my hands to work for His Kingdom. I could see in my mind something being built up, like a brick wall, and each brick was one of these preconceived notions of the Race.
Then the Lord destroyed that wall in such an amazing way. He deconstructed everything I thought about what the Race was, what I would do on it, how it would affect me. It’s not that I didn’t have high expectations, yet it was so much more than I understood before. The World Race is not simply a mission trip. God showed me how He would use the Race to further craft me into the person He created me to be. “I have far more than you could ever imagine prepared for you on this trip,” He spoke into my heart.
Now, I was fighting back tears as these thoughts and this multitude of emotions churned within me. I looked around at the seemingly normal, non-crying people. I can’t break down now! I thought. It’s the first night! Surely people would think, “Wow this kid couldn’t hold it together through the first worship session.” Then from behind I felt the gentle hand of my coach Becky upon my shoulder as she began praying for me. And I lost it. I didn’t care. No tear was held back.
This was the very first night. The Lord didn’t waste any time. I realized at the end of camp that He used that experience to prepare and open my heart to everything He wanted to show me and teach me the rest of the week.
That week was so much more than I had planned. I encountered some of the most extraordinary souls: my squadmates, my leaders, my coaches, my training team, Racers from other squads. I didn’t want to leave them. I came to the end of camp encouraged, edified, excited, emboldened. I was not quite the same person when I went home. I also found that at some point during camp, practically everyone had some sort of experience like mine the first night.
Our good Father made Himself known in tremendous ways in those 10 days; I can’t begin to fathom what He’ll do through the 11 months.
