11/8/2020, a beautiful Sunday morning in Gainesville, Georgia. It was the day after my squad got back from serving in Louisiana and we were met with sunset colored leaves, a pine tree breeze and the scent of fall rising from this picturesque scene. The overwhelming feeling of joy danced through my being as I took in all the amazing autumn gifts that were over powering my senses. The beautiful fall vibes weren’t even close to the amazing gifts God had for me this dear sabbath day. I began my sabbath by watching a teaching about spiritual gifts, while the teaching was marvelous, I still retained a feeling of doubt towards this idea. As we drew closer to the end of this lesson I was shaken out of my notes by God’s voice in my head, “Why do you doubt me?” To say His question was convicting would be an understatement, I honestly had no idea why it was so hard for me to believe in God’s abilities, I had seen and heard about them before, I just could never convince myself that these things could actually be possible. After the teaching I removed myself to go worship with the trees, as I swayed with the wind I explained to God that I wanted to have a spiritual gift, but it seemed like a lot of work to study them, so I asked Papa to give me the energy to receive His gifts for me. As I sang, prayed and danced in my little hidden cove I felt an intense happiness take over my body, I suddenly had an urge to start speaking, before I knew it I gave into the urge and an unknown language was flowing off of my lips. The only way I can describe this felicity is to imagine God being the sun, but instead of the sun being light years away it was right above my head. I felt as though I was engulfed with flames, but not harmful flames, but the flames of Jesus lighting a fire in my soul. I was overtaken with tears, energy, joy, happiness and hundreds of other feelings at the same time. I felt Papa wrap me up in His loving arms and say, “you don’t have to figure out your gifts, you just have to be willing to let them flow out of you.” 11/8/2020, a beautiful Sunday afternoon in Gainesville, Georgia God gave me the gift of tongues.
11/10/2020, a beautiful Tuesday evening. We were enjoying some yummy soup on a nice rainy evening while watching a session about being a character for God and choosing into Him everyday and I was once again convicted. How many times do we see amazing miracles from God, then just go back to life as usual? How many times do we sing the words “He has broken every chain, there’s salvation in His name,” at church then go back to condemning ourselves Monday morning? How many times do we read stories of Jesus healing the blind and raising the dead only to close the bible and go about our hopeless attitudes? I know I’m guilty of this, I cannot even name the amount of times I have felt numb towards God’s name and miracles. Luckily for me God is in a constant reckless pursuit of me and my heart and this gorgeous evening is just another example of Him chasing me down. During the teaching we were given time to worship and pray, so I began to pray, I prayed for God to continue to light a fire inside of me everyday so I don’t lose my joy and as I prayed suddenly I began to speak in tongues, I was once again overwhelmed with the closeness of Papa and just felt Him wrapping me up in His safe loving arms. I had no idea what I said in tongues, but it didn’t take long for God to reveal what I had said and how He answered blew my mind. Last summer, almost a year and a half ago I was diagnosed with a lifelong condition that has no cure and I have been living life knowing that my life would never really be the same. Well while I was praying suddenly I felt light shoot through and around my body, at that moment I realized that when I prayed in tongues I asked God for healing and He answered, He 100% healed me and I didn’t even realize I asked for healing. God then said to me, “I have healed you so now go out and give others the gift I have given you.” 11-10-2020, a beautiful Tuesday evening in Gainesville, Georgia God healed me and gave me the gift of healing.
I have no doubt in my mind that God is going to continue to lavish me with His gifts and continue to pursue me and put His joy inside me. I cannot wait to see the amazing ways God is able to use me as His vessel. I want to challenge you to surrender your numbness and doubt to God and let Him fill you up, because feeling God smile on you is truly the most amazing thing you will ever experience.
