Josh and Jen Mendenhall are the only married couple on our squad and as of March 1 (the final deadline for money) they still had over $10,000 to raise to be fully funded. They have been fighting hard for the last year and a half to raise money, 31,000 dollars for the both of them. Each deadline has been a struggle, and most of our squad, especially myself had pretty much accepted that they were going home a few weeks ago.
I will be honest… I have been really selfish and have not loved them well. I have a hard time asking for money, its both uncomfortable and hurts my pride. I was incredibly blessed in raising my support, although it wasn't easy… I have an unbelievable support system and quickly raised most of my funds. This past month, 2 of my teammates needed a significant amount of money to stay on the race. As you all know from my blog, I asked you to support them as well… because I know them and I love them and I couldn't imagine the race without them. I fought for them: in prayer and in action.
Josh and Jen asked all of us to write a blog about their story and their struggles, and share it with everyone we know. They had done all they could and asked for their brothers and sisters to fight for and with them. This was 2 days after my blog asking for money for my teammates. I decided that I didn't want to ask for money again, that it was uncomfortable, that they had so much to raise, and because I don't know them that well… I justified these thoughts.
We have spent the last few days at our Malaysia debrief. Enjoying a few days of fellowship, relaxation and teaching. The first night we were their the squad leaders announced that after debrief Josh and Jen would be returning to the states. We were learning about love and discipleship and the next morning my brother Anton got up and gave one of the most humbling/challenging talks I have ever heard.
He got up and called us out. He called us out for not practicing what we were preaching if you will. We are traveling across the world to love and fight for God's children. But he challenged us that if we couldn't fight and sacrifice for Josh and Jen, how on earth can we fight for people that we don't even know or love? That this is where the Lord wants them, so what are we really doing about it?
I John 3:18 says "Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue, but with actions and in truth". I have had that verse memorized for years. Yet memorization and knowledge is nothing without action.
In less than 5 minutes, one worship song, a handful of tears and a lot of convictions there was 12,200 dollars. 5 minutes was all it took for 56 poor missionaries, who have been exhausted with fundraising over the past year, to see the absolute goodness and provision of our King. With all of us fighting together, abandoning ourselves and our comfort and our entitlement to "our" money we raised almost an entire WR trip.
This broke me. I saw the most tangible love in action that I have ever witnessed and it was humbling beyond words. I saw in disgust my selfishness and lack of love for my brother and sister in Christ but at the same time I saw God's goodness through my weakness. That despite my refusal to fight, He never stopped fighting and He never will.
" Daddy, thank you that you are such a big God and that you are not limited by our lack of actions or trust in you. Thank you that you only give good gifts and that you are a miracle worker. Thank you for your living word, and how when it is put in to action, your kingdom comes. Thank you for your heart and compassion and that you don't work in the ways of this world. Forgive me for my doubt, my selfishness, my weakness. Thank you for your heart, patience , and strength. I pray that you would continue to teach me about love in action. Amen"
