Debrief: a 4-5 day period of rest, relaxation, and refilling in preparation to keep moving forward in overflow.
Debrief takes place after month 1, 4, and 9 of World Race Gap Year. Each squad has a team of leadership on the field as well as in the Adventures office in Georgia. During debrief, the leadership team in the states comes to visit the squad and pour out wisdom in teachings and worship. As a squad, we are always excited for debrief as a time to refill with the Lord and enjoy community together. When we arrived to Peru, it was time for our 2nd debrief to begin! Sadly, this was also when I began to feel sick. In feeling terrible and being admitted to the hospital, I wasn’t able to attend any of the sessions or spend much time with our squad. This broke my heart. I thrive in community and teachings… why did I have to be sick at one of my favorite times? My body was over exhausted for me to get too worked up about this, but I was for sure unhappy. In the process of being sick, Tori and I weren’t able to travel with the rest of our team to the ministry site here in Peru. All of this together made me want to scream. Debrief ended and I felt unhealthy, unrested, and empty.
Today came, the 14th of January, and Tori was well enough to be discharged from the hospital! I was praising the Lord for His healing and the hand of the sweet doctors we encountered. After leaving the hospital for the final time and getting Tori settled into the hostel, the Lord reminded me that we haven’t spent much time together lately. I grabbed my journal, laptop, and some cash and off I went. I landed at Starbucks (one of my classic white-girl favorites) and listened to a podcast about ridding the game of comparison. This was perfect timing, as I was comparing my experience at debrief with the experiences of others. Not only did this upset me, but I felt a pang of jealousy through my bones. I yearned for the voice of the Father, yet felt stripped of it by physical struggles.
After listening to the podcast and feeling more confident, I felt the Father pushing my desire for adventure. I picked myself up and started walking. I’ve never really been taken on a date by the Father before, but I have no other words to describe what happened next. Peruvian women in vibrant colors and half-moon smiles filled each corner, as well as the llama that accompanied them. These women brought nothing but smiles to my face. As I was lost in thought of what to do next, amazed by the creativity of the Father, a taxi pulled up right in front of me. The man driving rolled down his window and asked where I was headed. I somehow named a random street, not knowing what it was, and continued to have a conversation with the man in complete Spanish. The drive lasted about 10 minutes, and I learned that this man, Victor, had lived in Cusco his entire life. He also has four daughters, each within a year of each other. He showed me a photo, and wow, they were beautiful! When I asked about his wife, he teared up at the idea of her. He poured out everything he loved about her: her eyes, her heart, her ability to have fun, her skill in the kitchen, all of it. They have been happily married for 37 years now. Victor’s love for his wife is still blooming, even after 37 years. That is the kind of love I pray we all have the blessing of living. When we arrived to the street I had requested at the start, Victor refused that I pay. He said I reminded him too much of his daughters to have to pay. We said our goodbyes, and I started to walk. If you were to ask me to repeat the conversation, I truly don’t think I could. The Lord did all the talking here.
As I was walking down the narrow and quiet streets, the Lord planted the thought of my husband in my mind. He asked me what I wanted in the man I would spend my life with. I never thought the Father would ask ME this, I always assumed He knew all the answers and that was that. He then reminded me that He craves to hear the desires of my heart. “If you’re sure…” I thought. I began to go through everything I had ever wanted in a husband: the silly things, the heartfelt, the strong, and everything in between. It was a good feeling and got me excited (and a little mushy on the inside). I landed at a coffee shop and met two women, one from the states. She explained to me that her life was a bit hectic, so she resorted to travelling the world. She discussed how South America has been her favorite, specifically Peru. And then she was off to discover something new. After drinking some lemonade and talking more with the Lord, I kept walking. The road I was on became a dead end, yet the dead end was a door. I looked up to see the shop title and only saw flowers. A car was coming behind me, so my only option was to go inside. This shop surprised me. Not only was it a coffee shop, one of my favorite things, but it was also a store that sold handmade items and photography. They were also playing Ed Sheeran over the speakers—I was hooked instantly. I walked in and chose a table right by the window, overlooking the streets. The girl behind the counter asked me if I liked chocolate. (as if this is even a question.) After answering a little too excited, she offered me a piece of chocolate cake. For FREE. I began to ask the Lord why He was blessing me so tenderly and intentionally. “That’s how dates work!” He responded.
! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
We were on a date!! I Father-Daughter date! How on earth could I not notice. I sat there looking out at the streets with the biggest smile on my face. “I’m focused on you right now. You are precious to me,” He kept repeating. I’ve known this is true, but it’s never felt so near till that moment. I kept getting a picture of an arrow pointing to myself; soft yet direct. I look to my left and see it: a ring that embodied this to a T. “Treat yourself,” whispered the Father. You best believe I grabbed that ring faster than an angry alpaca spits. I felt so cherished here, treated how I know I’m to be treated. Sitting there all giddy and joyful, I met two more women. Each of them were in their 60s and explained to me that they have been best friends all their lives. Both of their husbands had recently passed away, so they decided to go and see the world. They proceeded to ask me what I was doing in Peru, so young. I explained World Race to them and why I chose it. Then I got hit with a question I’ve never been hit with before:
“Why do you believe in the God you believe in?”
Shoot, y’all. Everyone should answer this at some point, but I had no idea today was my day. I told the story of how I was raised, baptized, and then how I developed my own beliefs once I was in high school. I told them the stories of the countless times I’ve been healed, the times I’ve seen the Lord in my friends, and even the quiet moments of hearing His voice. They were very open to my opinion, and even congratulated me on standing so strong in how I felt. The women eventually left, leaving me in a whirlwind of emotion. The shop owner told me it was closing time and I was on my way. As I walked the streets in search of a taxi to the hostel, I pondered my day. The Lord saw me in my state of sadness and jealousy and flipped it completely. He romanced me in some of my favorite ways: wisdom, coffee, a ring, adventure, community, and chocolate cake. If that isn’t a solid combination, I’m not sure what is. Though I wasn’t able to experience debrief the way I originally wanted to, the Lord saw my needs and filled them perfectly. It’s days like today I’ll never forget… the Father craves us so well.
Here’s a photo of the ring, it’s on my pointer finger!
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Songs that made today special…
“Out of Hiding” by Steffany Gretzinger
“Summertime Romance” by Johnnyswim
“Tenerife Sea” by Ed Sheeran
