Here we go, first blog post, wow. I’m not sure how to go about writing this, so I am just going to tell you about how and where God has been in this journey for me.
I had never heard of the World Race until my sophomore year of high school. I had just gotten back from a mission trip in Kenya, Africa. At church the next Sunday, one of my dear friends came up to me and said “Congratulations I saw you committed to going on the world race after high school!” I had definitely not, because I had definitely never heard of the race. Turns out my friend had seen someones post on Instagram that looked like something I would post… we laughed about that later. But, curious and with a fire for missions in my heart, I went home and researched. When I realized what the World Race Gap Year was (9 months of living in 3/4 different countries, partnering alongside different ministries and communities to bring Glory to the Kingdom) I knew I wanted to do just that after high school.
From that moment on, for about two years, The race was a lot of what consumed my thoughts. At some point, truth be told, my hearts intentions for wanting to go became self seeking and motivated by unrealistic images I had seen on social media. So, one morning my Junior year I woke up, and with no apparent warning, I felt God tell me “Natalie, you don’t need to think of this anymore, I want you to look to me.” It was like He touched His grace-filled hand to my mind and gave me peace.
That was great news, because I knew it was God’s voice. So I dropped it all and listened. However in the moment I took this word as a “no” to the world race. So I crossed it off my radar completely. But, what I have come to learn during this time, is that His “no” is sometimes a “not yet, child.” I needed that time to grow more in tuned with The Spirit and His desires for me, not my own. I needed that time to struggle through other things, and learn the hard way. I needed that time to learn to pray and move where I felt lead at the moment.
And sure enough, when I was sitting on my computer, researching possibilities for my life this next season, I came back across the World Race. And it felt right. So, I prayed (I am praying). I worried (I still worry) that it would be the wrong decision. Yet, I also relearned to TRUST (I’m still trusting) that He has gone before me and behind me, right up until the end of the age (Matthew 28:20)! This decision is not in vein.
When I applied, I had no idea the circumstances our world would face a month later. But, I did know what was going on in the world a few weeks ago when I officially committed to going on the World Race in September. I knew full well what a risk this was. But that is precisely what trust is. It is taking the next step off the boat into the open sea when you hear the call of Jesus. It is trusting that despite the lack of sight, because of the wind and storms, that my next step is secure because I recognize the voice who is calling me to take it. And this is hard, but this is faith. Its funny how I had lost sight of what real trust and faith look like until now. But by-golly, I am still learning right along with the whole earth right now what real trust is like.
May we just partner together in life, to Trust like peter did, even despite the lack of vision. May we trust the gentle hand that is guiding us every day towards the light.
Love love love love love Nat